IMAGE  EVALUATION 
TEST  TARGET  (MT-3) 


LO 


I.I 


1.25 


2.5 

iiiiii 

2.0 


1.4 


111^ 
1.6 


V] 


^ 


/a 


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O 


/a 


7 


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Photographic 

Sciences 

Corporation 


23  WEST  MAIN  STREET 

WEBSTER,  N.Y.  14580 

(716)  872-4503 


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% 


V 


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CIHM/ICMH 

Microfiche 

Series. 


CIHM/ICMH 
Collection  de 
microfiches. 


Canadian  Institute  for  Historical  Microreproductions  /  Institut  Canadian  de  microreproductions  historiques 


Technical  and  Bibliographic  IMotes/IMotes  techniques  et  bibliographiques 


The  Institute  has  attempted  to  obtain  the  best 
original  copy  available  for  filming.  Features  of  this 
copy  which  may  be  bibliographically  unique, 
which  may  alter  any  of  the  images  in  the 
reproduction,  or  which  may  significantly  change 
the  usual  method  of  filming,  are  checked  below. 


D 


D 


n 


n 


Coloured  covers/ 
Couverture  de  couleur 


I      I    Covers  damaged/ 


Couverture  endommagde 


Covers  restored  and/or  laminated/ 
Couverture  restaurde  et/ou  pellicul^e 


□    Cover  title  missing/ 
Le  titre  de  couverture  manque 

□    Coloured  maps/ 
Cartes  g^ographiques  en  couleur 


Coloured  inl<  (i.e.  other  than  blue  or  black)/ 
ere  de  couleur  (i.e.  autre  que  bleue  ou  noire) 


I      I    Coloured  plates  and/or  illustrations/ 


D 


Planches  et/ou  illustrations  en  couleur 

Bound  with  other  material/ 
Relid  aveu  d'autres  documents 

Tight  binding  may  cause  shadows  or  distortion 
along  interior  margin/ 

Lareliure  serr^e  peut  causer  de  I'ombre  ou  de  la 
distortion  le  long  de  la  marge  intdrieure 

Blank  leaves  added  during  restoration  may 
appear  within  the  text.  Whenever  possible,  these 
have  been  omitted  from  filming/ 
II  se  peut  que  certaines  ;  3ges  blanches  ajoutdes 
lors  d'une  restauration  apparaissent  dans  le  texte, 
mais,  lorsque  cela  dtait  possible,  ces  pages  n'ont 
pas  6t6  filmdes. 

Additional  comments:/ 
Commentaires  suppl6mentaires; 


L'Institut  a  microfilm^  le  meilleur  exemplaire 
qu'il  lui  a  6t6  possible  de  se  procurer.  Les  details 
de  cet  exemplaire  qui  sont  peut-dtre  uniques  du 
point  de  vue  bibliograj?i.ique,  qui  peuvent  modifier 
une  image  reproduite,  ou  qui  peuvent  exiger  une 
modification  dans  la  mdthode  normale  de  filmage 
sont  indiquds  ci-dessous. 


I      I    Coloured  pages/ 


D 
D 


Pages  de  couleur 

Pages  damaged/ 
Pages  ondommag^es 

Pages  restored  and/oi 

Pages  restaurdes  et/ou  pelliculdes 

Pages  discoloured,  stained  or  foxei 
Pages  d6color6es,  tachetdes  ou  piqudes 

Pages  detached/ 
Pages  ddtachdes 

Showthrough> 
Transparence 

Quality  of  prir 

Qualiti  indgale  de  I'impression 

Includes  supplementary  materii 
Comprend  du  matdriel  suppldmentaire 


I      I  Pages  damaged/ 

I — I  Pages  restored  and/or  laminated/ 

I — I  Pages  discoloured,  stained  or  foxed/ 

I      I  Pages  detached/ 

I      I  Showthrough/ 

I      I  Quality  of  print  varies/ 

I      I  Includes  supplementary  material/ 


Only  edition  available/ 
Seule  Edition  disponible 

Pages  wholly  or  partially  obscured  by  errata 
slips,  tissues,  etc.,  have  been  refilmed  to 
ensure  the  best  possible  image/ 
Les  pages  totaiement  ou  partiellement 
obscurcies  par  un  feuillet  d'errata,  une  pelure, 
etc.,  ont  6x6  filmdes  d  nouveau  de  fapon  d 
obtenir  la  meilleure  image  possible. 


This  item  is  filmed  at  the  reduction  ratio  checked  below/ 

Ce  document  est  filmd  au  taux  de  reduction  indiqud  ci-dessous. 


10X 

14X 

18X 

22X 

26X 

30X 

y 

12X 


16X 


20X 


24X 


28)( 


32X 


The  copy  filmed  here  has  been  reproduced  thanks 
to  the  generosity  of: 

Libr;«iy  of  the  Public 
Archives  of  Canada 


L'exemplaire  film6  fut  reproduit  grfice  d  la 
gin6rosit4  de: 

La  bibllothdque  des  Archives 
publiques  du  Canada 


The  images  appearing  here  are  the  best  quality 
possible  considering  the  condition  and  legibility 
of  the  original  copy  and  in  keeping  with  the 
filming  contract  specifications. 


Les  images  suiva>  ites  ont  6t6  reproduites  avec  le 
plus  grand  soin,  compte  tenu  de  la  condition  et 
de  la  nettetd  de  l'exemplaire  film6,  et  en 
conformity  avec  les  conditions  du  contrat  de 
filmage. 


Original  copies  in  printed  paper  covers  are  filmed 
beginning  with  the  front  cover  and  ending  on 
the  last  page  with  a  printed  or  illustrated  impres- 
sion, or  the  back  cover  when  appropriate.  All 
other  original  copies  are  filmed  beginning  on  the 
first  page  with  a  printed  or  illustrated  impres- 
sion, and  ending  on  the  last  page  with  a  printed 
or  illustrated  impression. 


Les  exemplaires  originaux  dont  la  couverture  en 
papier  est  imprimde  sont  film6s  en  commenqant 
par  le  premier  plat  et  en  terminant  soit  par  la 
dernidre  page  qui  compere  une  empreinte 
d'impression  ou  d'illustration,  soit  par  le  second 
plat,  salon  le  cas.  Tous  les  autres  exemplaires 
originaux  sont  filmds  en  commen9ant  par  la 
premidre  page  qui  comporte  une  empreinte 
d'impression  ou  d'illustration  et  en  terminant  par 
la  derniire  page  qui  comporte  une  telle 
empreinte. 


The  last  recorded  frame  on  each  microfiche 
shall  contain  the  symbol  —»>  (meaning  "CON- 
TINUED "),  or  the  symbol  V  (meaning  "END"), 
whichever  applies. 


Un  des  symboles  suivants  apparaitra  sur  la 
dernidre  image  de  cheque  microfiche,  selon  le 
cas:  le  symbols  —^'  signifie  "A  SUIVRE",  le 
symbols  V  signifie  "FIN". 


Maps,  plates,  charts,  etc.,  may  be  filmed  at 
different  reduction  ratios.  Those  too  large  to  be 
entirely  included  in  one  exposure  are  filmed 
beginning  in  the  upper  left  hand  corner,  left  to 
right  and  top  to  bottom,  as  many  frames  as 
required.  The  following  diagrams  illustrate  the 
method: 


Les  cartes,  planches,  tableaux,  etc.,  peuvent  dtre 
film6s  d  des  taux  de  reduction  diff^rents. 
Lorsque  le  document  est  trop  grand  pour  dtre 
reproduit  en  un  seul  clich6,  il  est  filmd  d  partir 
de  Tangle  supdrieur  gauche,  de  gauche  d  droite, 
et  de  haut  en  bas,  en  prenant  ie  nombre 
d'images  n6cessaire.  Les  diagrammes  suivants 
illustrent  la  mdthode. 


1 

2 

3 

1 

2 

3 

4 

5 

6 

« 


-, 


BONE  ^o  GNAW, 


FOR     THE 


DEMOCRATS;  ' 


O  R, 


QBSERV  ATIONS 

ON     A 

PAMPHLET,  ; 


ENTITLED, 


,V- 


"  THE  POLITICAL  PROGRESS  OF  BRITAIN." 


« 


■.r. 


■Jr-J  -:,. 


k 

'.■^-■^--  . 

"    > 


THE  THIRD  EDITION,  REVISED. 


"  Q^and  t"  manges,  do.:nes  a'  manger 
"  Aux  chicDs,  duflcnt-ils  te  mordre. 


La  Pompadouf.** 


P  H  I  LA  D  E  L  P  H  I  A 


Printed  by  William  Young, 


-v"^'.  iti^ji.  ■'. 


For  WILLIAM  COBBETT,     oppofite   Chrift's  Church. 


lICj 


jV7*  :  y 


^y    I 


/    . 


Ml 


■m 


PREFACE. 


READER, 


'* 


I 


Y  you  have  a  Shop  to  TtiinJ,  or  any 
other  buftnefs  to  do^  I  advife  you  to  go  and  do  it, 
and  let  this  book  alone  ;  for,  I  can  ajfure  you, 
it  contains  nothing  of  half  fo  much  importance 
to  you,  as  the  f ale  of  a  fkein  of  thread  or  a  yard 
of  tape.  By  fuch  a  tranfaBion  you  might  pof 
fibly  make  a  net  profit  of  half  a  farthing,  a  thing, 
though  feemingly  of  fmall  value,  much  more 
worthy  your  attention  than  the  treafures  under 
the  State  Houfe  at  Amflerdam,  or  all  the  mines 
of  Peru.  Half  a  farthing  might  lay  the  foun- 
dation of  a  brilliant  fortune,  andfooner  than  you 
Jhould  be  deprived  of  it  by  this  work,  though  it 
may  be  called  my  offspring,  I  would,  like  the 
worjlnppers  of  Moloch,  commit  it  to  the  flames 
with  my  own  hands. 


If  you  are  "0/  that  fe'x,  vulgarly  called  the 
Fair,  but  which  ought  always  to  be  called  the 
Divine,  let  ?}ie  befeech  you,  if  you  value  your 
charm,  to  proceed  no  farther.  Politics  is  a 
mixture  of  anger  and  deceit,     and*  thsfe  are  the 


-wrnmBBn^amm 


7-^^^n 


91 


PREFACE. 


mortal  enemies   of  Beauty,     The  injlant  n  lady 
turns  poMcian^  farewell  ihcfmiles,  the  dimples^ 
the  rofes  ;  the  graces  abandon  her^  and  age  fets 
his  feal  on  her  front.      We  never  find   Hebe, 
goddefs  ever  fair  and  ever  young,  chattering  pO' 
litics  at  the  table  of  the  gods  ;    and  though  Ve- 
nus  once   interpofcd  in  behalf  of  her    beloved 
Paris,  the  fpcar  of  Diomede  taught  her    "  to 
tremble  at  the  name  ofarjus"      And  have  -we  not 
a  terrible  a^ample  of  recent,    very  recent,  date  ? 
I  mean  that  of  the  unfortunate  Mary  Wolfton- 
craft.     //  is  a  well  known  fafi^  that^  vuhen  that 
poUtica    lady  began  The    Rights   of  Women, 
floe  had  a^  frne  blak  hair  as  you  'would  vuifh  to  fee, 
and  thai  befo?  e  the  fecond  fheet  of  the  ''vork  went 
to  the  prefs,  it  was  turned  as  uhiie,  and  a  great 
deal  whiter  than   her  fhin.      Tou  mufi    needs 
think,  I  have  the  ambition  common  to  every    au- 
thor;  that  is  to  fay,  to  be  read;  but  I  declare, 
that,  fooner  i  han  bleach  one  auburn    ringlet,  or 
even  afingle  hair  ;  fooner  than  rob  the  world  of  one 
heavenly  f mile,  I  would  with  pleafure  fee  my  pam- 
phlet torn  up  to  light  the  pipes  of  a  Democratic  club, 
or  burnt,  like  the  Political  Progrefs,  by  the  hands 
of  a  Scotch  hang7nan,  or  even  loaded  with  apflauf- 
<?j /'j' //;^  Philadelphia   Gazette. 

//  is  a  little  fingular for  an  author  to  write  a 
Preface  to  hinder  his  work  from  being  read  ; 
hut  this  is  not  my  intention  ;  all  Iwifh  to  do,   is. 


A/ 


R 


A 


93 


* 

to  confine  it  within  its  proper  fphere^  I  am  aware 
that  my  Jtncerity  in  this  refpcd  may  be  called  in 
quejlion,  and  that  malice  may  afcribe  to  me  mo- 
tives that  never  entered  my  thoughts  :  but  of  this 
I  am  totally  rcgardlefs  j  ;;;;'  work  anfwers  to  its 
title,  and,  confequently,  nobody  but  the  Democrats 
can  have  any  thing  to  do  with  it,  JSor  does  it 
court*  their  approbation  ;  I  throw  it  in  among/i 
them,  as  amongjl  a  kennel  cf  hounds  \  Jet  them 
fnarl  and  growl  over  ii,  and  Jlaver  it ;  the 
more  they  wear  out  their  fangs  this  way,  the  lefs 
danger ms  will  be  their  bite  hereafter^ 


li,-!       ■'•■      I 


Philadelphia,  Feb.   I9th5  1795. 


/ 


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I'w    ■  !■■  ■■■■■►■wai 


A 


BONE        TO        GNAW, 


TOR        THE 


DEMOCRATS. 


THOUGH  the  good  people  of  America  can- 
not for  their  lives  comprehend  the  views, 
from  ^vhich  they  have  been  favoured  with  a 
publication  of  the  Political  Progrcfs  of  Britain,  ' 
we  may  fuppofe,  that  the  fondnels  of  the  Author 
led  him^  to  fee  a  poflibility  of  its  being  read  ; 
and,  as  it  is  in  the  nature  of  reading  to  'rjve  rife 
to  obfcrvations,  he  will  not  be  furprifed,  that 
fome  of  thofe,  arifing  from  the  reading  of  his 
patriotic  labours,  have  by  a  very  ordinary  pro> 
cefs,  found  their  way  into  print/  It  is  thus  that 
books,  more  grateful  than  the  children  of  men, 
never  fail  to  yield  afliflance  to  thofe  that  have 
given  them  birth.  Whenever  negledl:  jays  its 
icy  hand  on  an  unfortunate  production,  another 
flies  to  its  aid;  and,  though  it  cannot  cancel 
the  irrevocable  doom;  it  faves  it,  for  a  n.o- 
me  nt  at  lead,  from  the  jaws  of  the  unclean 
mo  nfler,  that  is  day  and  night  gaping  to  receive 
it . ,  Such  being,  at  Itafl  in  part,  the  charitable 


,-.^  -■..^•. 


TT 


n 


(     9^     ) 

views  of  thi<!  pamphlet,  it  will  undoubtedly  meet 
with  a  hearty  vvc:lcomc  from  all  the  friends  of 
7he  Policical  Progrefs^  and  particularly  from  its 
i\utlior. 

Let  mc  then  afk  ;  what  could  induce  him  to 
come  a*  the  wa*  from  F.Jinborouirh  to  Philadel- 
phia io  make  an  attack  upon  poor  old  Kn^hind  ? 
And,  if  this  be  farisfadorily  accounted  for, 
tipon  principles  of  domeftic  philofophy,  which 
teaches  us,  that  froth  and  fcum  Hopped  in  at  one 
place  will  buril:  out  at  another,  (till  1  mud  be 
permitted  to  alk  ;  what  could  induce  him  to 
imagine,  that  the  citizens  of  the  United  States 
were,  in  any  manner  whatever,  interefted  in 
the  affair  ?  What  are  his  adventures  in  Scotland, 
and  his  narrow  efcape/*  to  us,  who  live  on 
this  fide  the  Atlantic  ?  What  do  we  care  whether 
his  alT.)ciates,  Ridgway  and  Syrnons,  are  lUil  in 
Ncw;are,  or  whether  they  have  been  tranflated 
to  iSurfreon's  Hall  ?  Is  it  any  thing  to  us  whether 
he  prefers  Charley  to  George,  or  George  to 
Charley,  any  more  than  whether  he  ufed  to  eat 
his  burgoo  with  his  fmgcrs  or  with  a  horn  fppon? 
"What  are  his  debts  and  his  mifery  to  us?  Jult 
as  if  we  cared  whether  his  polteriors  were  cov- 
ered with  a  pair  of  breeches,  or  a  kelt,  or 
whether  he  wa.-  literally  fans  culorte  ?  In  Great 
Britain,  indeed,  his  barking  might  anfwer  feme 
purpole ;  there  he  was  near  the  object  of  his 
fury  ;  but  here  he  is  like  a  cur  howling  at  the 
Mooii. 

Indeed,  he  himfelf  feems  to  have  been  fully 
feiifibleof  the  ridiculoufnefs  of  the  fituation  in 
which  this  publication  would  place  him,  and 
therc^fore  he  has  had  the  precaution  to  furround 
himlelf  with  com])any,  to  keep  him  in  counte- 
nance.    He  fays  that  Af"   Jeffcrfon^  late  Ameri- 


(    97    ) 


can  Secretary  of  State,  fpoke  of  his  work,  on 
tiiflcrent  occafions,  in  rcfpedful  terms ;  and  that 
he  declared,  "  it  contained  the  mod  allonifliing 
**  concentration  of  abufes,  that  he  had  ever  heard 
*'  of."  He  tells  us  bcfides,  tliat  other  gentlemen 
have  delivered  their  opiniowj  to  the  fame  cflVd  ; 
and  that  their  encouragement  was  one  i^rincipal 
caufe  of  the  appearance  of  this  American  edition. 
•  And  did  he  in  good  earned,  imagine  that  mix- 
ing with  fuch  comp.my  would  rciuk-r  his  peri'on 
facred  and  invulnerable  ?  He  fhould  have  recol- 
lected, that  though  ox\itfc.ib!jy  fli  'cp  infeds  a  whole 
flock,  he  does  not  thereby  work  his  own  cure. 

As  to  Mr.  yejferfon^  1  mult  luppofe  him  en- 
tirely out  of  the  Qiieftion  ;  for  nobody  that  has 
the  lead  knowledge  of  the  talents,  penetration  and 
tafte  of  that  Gentleman,  will  ever  believe,  that 
he  could  find  any  thing  worthy  of  rcfped  in  a 
produdion,  evidently  intended  to  feduce  the 
rabble  of  North  Britain.  Bcfides,  upon  looking 
a  fecond  time  over  the  words  attributed  to  Mrs 
Jcffcrfon^  1  think,  it  is  eafy  to  difcover,  that  the 
quotation  is  erroneous  ;  the  word  abufes^  1  am 
pretty  confident,  fliould  be,  abufe  ;  and  thus, 
by  leaving  out  an  j,  the  fentence  exprefTcs  ex- 
adly  what  one  would  expert  from  fuch  a  per  Ton 
as  Mr.  Jcfferfon  :  *'  that  the  work  contained  the 
"  mod  adonilhing  concentration  of  abufe^  that 
"  he  had  ever  heard  of.'* 

With  refped  to  iho'iG.  other  gentlemen^  \\\\o{q  en- 
couragement has  thruded  the  Author  forward, 
it  is  not  difficult  to  c^uefs  to  what  clan  they  be- 
long  ;  but,  let  them  be  who  they  may,  and  let 
their  fituatioa  be  what  it  may  (and  if  I  am  right 
in  my  guefs,  it  is  at  this  time  aukward  enough) 
I  think  they  would  not    exchange  it  for  the  one 

:■■,       ..^      v.^^    -  --N 


I 


\'i 


li 


li 


(  98  ) 

tliey  have   placed  him  in.     He  vainly  imagines 
himfelf  the  hero  of  the  farce,  when  he  is  nothing 
but  the   buffoon.     Indeed  he  has   defcribed  the 
part  he  is   aOing  better  than  I,  or  any  one   elfe 
can  do  it.     He  fays  that  Authors  of  revoltion- 
ary   pamphlets  form   a  kind  of  "  forlorn  hope 
on  the  Ikirts   of  battle."      Every    one    knows, 
that  the  forlorn  hope,  or  enfans  perdu^  was,  a- 
mongfl:  the  ancient  Gauls,  compofed  of  the  out- 
cafts   of  fociety ;  wretches    whofe  lives  were  al- 
ready forfeited  (and  who  had  not  had  the  good 
luck,  like  our  Autlior,  to    "  efcape,"  who  were 
fet  in  the  front  of  battle,  not  for  their  courage, 
but  their  crimes.     The  comparifon  he  has  pilfer- 
ed from  Dean  Swift ;  it  is  therefore  juft  to   re- 
turn it  to  its   owner ;  but   as  to  the  application 
of  it   to  himfelf,  I  am  certain  npbody  can  have 
the  leaft  objeftion. 

However,  I  can  hardly  imagine,   that  the  ai» 
CQuragement  of  thefe  gentlemen  would,  alone,  have 
dragged  him  into  fo  dangerous  a  fervice.     I  think, 
his  condudl  may  be,  in  part,  accounted  for  up- 
on phyfical  principles.     We  are  told,  that  there 
is,  or  ought  to   be,  about   every   human  body, 
a  certain  part  called  the  crumena^  upon  which 
depends  the  whole  ceconomy   of  the  inteftines. 
When  the  crumena  is  full,  the  inteftines  are  in  a 
correfpondent  ftate  \  and  then    the  body  is  in- 
clined to  repofe,  and  the  mind  to  peace  and  grod 
neighbourhood  :    but   when    the  crumena  *  be- 
comes empty,  the  fympathetic  inteftines   are  im- 
mediately    contraded,    and   the  whole  internal 
ftate  of  the  patient  is  thrown  into  infurreftion 
and  uproar,  which,  communicating  itfelf  to  the 


*  The  purfc. 


(    99    ) 

brain  produces  what  a  learned  (late  phyfician 
calls  the  mania  reformatio  ;  and  if  this  malady  is  not 
flopped  at  once,  by  the  help  of  an  hempen  neck- 
lace, or  fome  other  remedy  equally  efficacious, 
it  never  fails  to  break  out  into  Atheifm,  Robbery, 
Unitarianifm,  Swindling,  Jocobinifm,  Maflacres, 
Civic  Feafts  and  Infurre£lions.  Now,  it  appears 
to  me,  that  out  unfortunate  Author  mufl  be 
afflided  with  this  dreadful  malady,  and  if  fo,  I 
will  appeal  to  any  man  of  feeling,  v/hether  his 
friends  would  not  have  fliewn  their  humanity, 
in  relieving  him  in  other  means  than  thofe  they 
hsive  encouraged  him  to  employ;  which,  befides 
being  unproductive,  have  expofed  both  h-m  and 
them  to  the  birch  of  public  opinion. 

Such  are  the  mighty  efFedts  of  the  mania  re- 
formatio, that  I  was  at  firil  inclined  to  believe, 
we  were  indebted  to  that  alone  for  the  publica- 
tion in  queftion  ;  and  that  the  gentkfnen,  from 
whom  the  author  had  received  encouragement  to 
proceed,  were  purely  the  creatures  of  his  difor- 
dered  imagination  ;  but  I  have  lately  feen  it  intro- 
duced to  public  notice  fo  often,  and  in  fuch  a  way, 
that  I  have  been   obliged  to  change  my  opinion. 

A  Newfpaper  printed  at  Philadelphia,  whofe 
motto  is,  "  The  public  will  our  guide  ; — the  pu'dic 
good  our  end'*  has  borne  a  confpicuous  p.irt  in 
"  ufhering  this  dark  born  devil  into  light. '^  In 
one  number  of  that  truly  puffing  print,  the 
fpeech  ot  a  member  of  Congrefs  is  cut  afunder 
in  the  middle,  for  the  purpofe  of  wedging  in  an 
extraft  from  The  Political  Progre/s  of  Britain, 
The  debate  was  on  the  propriety  of  the  boufe*s  cen- 
furing  certain  focieties  that  had  qljtjled  in  bringing 
about  an  infurreBion  in  the  wejiern  counties  of  Ptnn- 
fylvania  ;  and  the  extracted  morfel,    wedged  in 


>iii 


f^> 


ii 


r 


I 


(        100       ) 

as   above  mentioned,  went  to  prove  that  bread 
v)(is  abfolutcly  dearer  in  Scotland  than  in  England! 
—Well  enough    may   you   Hare  reader.       Was 
there  ever  fuch  an  impudent,  fuch  a    barefaced 
/>?/^as  this,    lince  the  noble  art   of   puffing  has 
been  dilcovered  ;     And  did  the  author  of  it  ima- 
gine, that  there  was  any  two  legged  creature  fo 
llupid   as  not  to  perceive  it  ?     It  is  an   infult  to 
our    national    underftanding.         Why    not    fay 
candidly  ;     *'    gentlemen  and  ladies,  here    is  a 
poor  man  in  diltrefs,    who,    for  want   of  better 
employment,    has  trumped  up  an  old  pamphlet, 
which    he  propofes  to  fell   for  a  new.  one  ;  in 
buying  each  of  you  one,    you  will  render  him  a 
great  iervice,    and  the  bookfellers  a  flill  greater. 
Unlefs  you  will  be  pleafed   to  beftow   your  chari- 
ty,   the  worms  will  (luff  away  upon  the  work, 
while   the  authors  belly    will   be  empty."     This 
would  have  been  plain  downright  honefl  dealing, 
and  would  have    brought   the  wiflied   for    relief 
at  once.     We  give  a  fixpence  to    a    good  blunt 
beggar  who    tells  his  cafe  in  three  words;    but 
we  have  not  time  to  liften  to  the  canting  fybil 
that  offers  to  tell  our  fortunes  for  a  halfpenny. 

The  gazette  above  mentioned,  in  good  will 
to  Great  Britain,  does  not  yield  to  The  Political 
Progrefs  itfelf.  It  can  do  any  thing,  it  can  work 
miracles,  when  the  "  public  will"  requires  it. 
For  this  year  pad  it  has  kept  an  army  of  a  hun- 
dred thoufand  Carmagnoles  in  conftant  rea- 
dinefs  to  invade  England,  and  has  even  landed 
them  once,  and  fet  them  to  fricafleing  the  poor 
Englifli,  with  as  little  mercy  as  they  do  the  poor 
Frogs  in  their  own  country.  Nor  is  it  fecond 
to  any,  with  refped  to  home  affairs.  It  may  be 
called  the  political  barometer  of  the  Union.     AX 


I  \ 


(     loi     ) 


li 


a  time  when  the  atmofphere  of  popular  opinion 
feemed  to  lower  over  the  principal  officers  of  the 
Federal  Governm(i:nt,  the  Editor,  in  conformi- 
ty to  the  firft  part  of  his  motto,  expunged  the 
word  Federal  from  the  title  of  his  gazette.  As 
a  reafon  for  this  alteration,  he  obferves,  with  his 
ufual  modefty  :  Previous  to  the  adoption  of 
'*  the  Federal  Conllitution,  this  paper  bore  an 
*'  honourable  and  decided  part  in  hs  favour  ;  but 
*'  this  Conflitution  no  longer  needs  the  aid  of  a 
"  Newfpaper."  Notwithltanding  this  plaufible 
excufe,  mod  people  thought,  that  the  expun- 
ging of  the  word  Federal  had  fomething  ominous 
in  it.  I  confefs  myfelf  to  have  been  of  that 
number ;  I  thought,  I  could  perceive  in  it 
a  preparatory  (tep  to  fomething  elfe :  as  fkilful 
mariners,  when  they  fee  a  ftorm  gathering, 
throw  the  heavy  lumber  overboard,  that  they 
may  be  able  to  tack  with  more  celerity.  And,  if 
things  had  taken  a  different  turn  from  what  they 
did,  who  knows  but  we  might  have  feen  the 
protean  Editor  change  his  prefent  refpedablc 
fign  *  for  the  head  of  Citizen  Genet  ?  Happily 
for  all  parties,  we  have  been  fpared  of  this  mor- 
tification, 

I  flop  here  to  throw  myfelf  on  the  mercy  of 
ihe  reader.  "  A  digreflion,"  fays  Shaftfbury,  "is 
"  ever  inexcufable  in  proportion  as  the  fubjed 
"  of  it  is  contemptible."  Acknowledging,  as 
I  do,  the  juftnefs  of  this  maxim,  I  am  but  too 
well  affured,  that  nothing  can  apologize  for  the 
digreffion  1  have  jufl  been  led  into. 

The  Political  Frogrefs  has,  as  the  girls  fay, 
more  than  one  firing  to  its   bow.     The  Editor 

*  Wafhington's  Head. 


4:1 


-  ■'•\ 


/•  ''T' 


f 


102      ) 


above-mentioned  is  furpaiTed  in  charity  by  one 
of  his  brethren  of  the  fame  city  ;  the  firft  has  on- 
ly recommended  it  to  others,  while  the  latter 
has  taken  it  under  his  own  roof.  I  Ihall  trouble 
the  reader  with  but  one  inftance,  among  a  hun- 
dred, of  this^f«/te(3«*s  generofity.  He  is  upon 
the  fubje£):  of  the  blood  that  has  been  fhed  in 
France,  fmce  the  commencement  of  the  Revo- 
lution. He  fays,  "  it  would  be  an  eafy  matter  io 
apologize  for  all  the  inajfacres  that  have  taken 
*'  place  in  that  country ;  but  even  taking  them 
as  they  are,  it  will  be  found,  upon  reflexion, 
that,  at  this  moment^  ihtfumoi  human  happi- 
nefs  is  greater  in  France  than  in  the  ^een  of 
IJIes  :**  thefe  are  his  very  words.  To  prove  this 
he  prefents  us  v/ith  "  an  anecdote,  copied  from 
a  work  of  great  merit  (to  be  had  at  the  office 
of  the  Aurora,)  entitled.  The  Political  Progrefs 
of  Britain,  This  rare  anecdote  informs  us, 
that,  in  the  year  one  thrfand  feven  hundred  and 
feventyfeven^  a  woman  was  hanged  at  I'yburn  for 
ftealing  a  piece  of  linen.  Now,  how  the  hanging 
of  a  woman  at  Tyburn,  in  1777,  could  reduce 
the  fum  of  human  happinefs  in  the  Queen  of  Ifles, 
in  1794;  and  how  the  redu6lion  of  the  fum  of 
human  happinefs  in  the  Queen  of  ifles  could  make 
an  addition  to  the  fum  of  human  happinefs  in 
France,  is,  I  prefume,  a  problem  to  be  folved  by 
thole,  and  thbfe  alone,  who  have  been  initiated 
in  the  arcanum  of  democratic  algebra. 

Many  have  been  the  conjectures  on  the  rea- 
fon  of  this  Print's  aiTaming  the  name  of  Aurora, 
The  Editor,  after  having,  like  a  fecond  Phae- 
ton, driven  the  blazing  car  of  democratic  fury, 
till  it  was  within  an   inch  of  burning  us  all  up 


tOY^inderSj  has  aHumed  the  gentle  gait  and  mo- 


te 


<e 


cc 


cc 


cc 


cc 


(     103     ) 


0- 


deft  veil  of  the  Goddefs  of  the  morning  :  "  A 
right  chip  of  the  Old  Block''*  as  Poor  Richard 
fays.  Some  think  that  having  feen  the  Sun  of 
all  his  hopes  and  expedlation,  fet  in  the  wejiy 
he  thought  it  was  high  time  to  rife  upon  us  from 
the  ecrfi.  But,  however,  this  is  not  the  reafon,  the 
thing  is  an  imitation  of  a  French  Paper,  conduct- 
ed by  "  Le  veritable  pere  du  Chene,'**  And 
bearing  the  motto,  "  Boygrement  Patrioiic.'*  Tt 
is  fomething  wonderful  that  the  Aurora  has  not 
adopted  a  motto  fo  charafteriftic  to  the  matter 
it  contains  :  but  to  make  ufe  of  a  well  known 
democratic  quotation,  "  nemo  repente  fuit  tur- 
piflimus."  f  Though,  perhaps,  the  Aurora,  and 
fome  other  prints  may  boaft  of  being  an  excep- 
tion to  this  maxim,  yet  it  may  ferve  as  a  feafona- 
ble  hint  to  their  readers. 

Never  mind,  reader ;  I  know  what  I  am  a- 
bout.  I  have  fet  my  foot  amongfl:  a  neft  of  vi- 
pers here  ;  but  the  poor  devils  do  not  know 
how  to  fting.  Let  them,  writhe  and  hifs,  while 
we  return  to  The  Political  Progrefs  of  Britain, 

Taking  it  for  granted,  that  the  author  is  nei- 
ther more  or  lefs  than  the  "  forlorn  hope"  of 
the  phalanx  by  whom  he  is  encouraged,  I  do  not 
look  upon  myielf  as  bound  to  obferve  the  laws 
of  neutrality  towards  them,  any  more  than  to- 
wards him  ;  and  therefore  I  fliall  make  very  free 
with  them  ;  whenever  they  may  fall  in  my  way. 
Nor  will  the  title  of  goitktnen,  which  he  has, 
and  very  uncitizen  like  too,  bellowed  on  them, 
withold    my  nandj    we  know  thathawkeis  and 

*  The  founder  of  the  religion  of  "  Reafon'*  in  Fi^jlce, 
and  of  which  the  editor  of  the  Aurora  is  now  publllhing  the 
manuel.  ' 

f  No  one  ever  became  infamous  all  at  once. 


1 


; 


r 


^ 


I . 


( 104 ) 

pedlers,  fwindlers,  higbwaymen  and  pickpoc- 
kets, call  one  another  gentlemen  ;  and  that  even 
the  members  of  every  felf-crp,ated  back-door 
club,  except  in  their  fulminatluns  ex  officio^  take 
the  fame  title  ;  but  does  this  prevent  any  body 
from  thinking  and  fpcaking  of  them  as  they  de- 
ferve;  Certainly  not.  They  claim  the  liberty 
of  the  prefs  in  the  evomition  of  their  anarchical 
poifon,  and  (liall  not  others  claim  the  fame  liber- 
ty in  adminidring  the  antidote  ? 

What  then  is  this  bleffed  performance  ?  what 
does  it  contain,  that  fuch  uncommon,  fuch  un- 
natural etforts  fhould  be  made  to  drag  it  into 
day  ;  Wjiy,  T/je  Pslitical  Progrefs,  or  Sawney^ s 
Complaint  (for  this  title  would  become  it  much 
better  than  the  one  it  has  aflfumed),  *  paints  in 
as  odious  a  light  as  black  and  white  will  admit 
of,  thole  kings  of  England  who  have  inflifted  fe- 
verities  on  the  Scotch  ;  it  abufes  all  the  mod 
celebrated  Whigs  of  the  United  Kingdoms,  and 
in  general  every  body  who  was  oppofed  to  the 
caule  of  the  P/Y/f«^^r  ;  it  contains  the  mod  fo- 
phiftical  and  ill-digefted  account  of  the  national 
debt,  the  wars,  taxes,  and  expences  of  govern- 

*  I  cannot  leave  the  reader  to  imajrlne  for  a  moment,  that 
I  aim  here  at  the  Scotch  In  peneral.  They  are  a  nation  I  re- 
fpeft  above  any  other,  except  my  own.  For  prudence, 
perfevcrance,  integrity,  courage,  and  learni.ig,  tliey  are  a- 
bove  all  praife.  And  as  to  loyalty,  by  no  means  the  lead  of 
virtues,  the  great  body  of  the  nation  are  far  more  loyal 
than  their  neighbours  in  the  South.  But  the  merits  -ind  fide- 
lity of  a  nation  can  neverjuftify  the  apoftacy  of  individuals,  af- 
ter having  confofTed  candidly  my  admiration  and  refpe£l  for 
the  one,  I  mull  be  allowed  to  exprefs  a«  candidly  my  abhor- 
rence of  the  other. 


i^  «•"'■= 


105     ) 


lat 

re- 
let, 
a- 
of 
ral 

de. 
af. 

for 
bor- 


ment  in  Great  Britain,  that  has  ever  yet  appear- 
ed  ;  in  fhort,  the  piece  altogether,  forms  one  of 
the  moit  complete  Whifky-boy  Biilingigate  li- 
bels, or  as  Mr.  Jifferfon  em^  hatically  exprefled 
it,  *'  the  mofl:  allonilhing  concentration  of  abufe," 
that  ever  was  feen,  or  heard  of. 

Yes,  reader,  look  at  it  again,  and  tell  mc 
what  you  can  find  here,  that  can  merit  the  atten- 
tion of  an  Amencan,  If  you  want  to  know  the 
chara6lers  of  the  kings  of  England,  you  will  find 
them  recorded  in  hlliory  ;  you  will  there  find 
the  good  with  the  bad  :  you  will  find,  that  they 
have  all  had  their  faults,  and  mofl  of  them  their 
virtues.  If  you  find  that  fome  of  them  were 
wolves,  you  will  never  find  that  their  fubje£ts  or 
their  neighbours  were  lambs.  From  the  fame 
fourceyou  v/ill  learn,  that,  ever  fince  the  abdica-- 
tion  of  James  II.  the  embers  of  difcontent  have 
been  kept  alive  in  Scotland,  by  the  means  of  ambi- 
tious demagogues :  you  will  find  that  their  influ- 
ence is  daily  decreafing,  but  that  Hke  the  Anti- 
federalifts  in  America,  they  feize  every  oppor- 
tunity to  exert  it,  in  reviling  the  government, 
reprefenting  every  tax  as  an  oppreflion,  and  ex- 
citing the  ignorant  to  infurre^dion.*     You  will 

*  I  wifh  we  could  fay,  that  a  change  of  air  had  produced 
a  change  of  condu£l  in  fome  of  them.  The  comrades  of 
Mu'ir  and  Palmer  were  no  fooner  landed  at  New- York 
laft  year,  than  they  began  to  attack  the  j^merican  Government. 
They  openly  declared,  that  it  was  ."  tarni/hed  by  the  lajl  and 
**  nvorji  d'ljgrace  of  a  free  gh'ocrnment ^^  and  faid,  that  they 
looked^orward  to  "  a  more perfcdjiate  of  Society^'  (See  their 
addrefs  to  the  Unitarian  Dollar.)  I  do  not  fay  that  they  had 
any  immediate  hand  in  the  wellern  atfair  :  but  when  rebels 
from  all  quarters  of  the  world  are  received  with  open  arms,  as 
perfecuttd  patriots,  it  is  no  wonder  that  rebellion  fhould  be 
looked  upon  as  patriotifm. 

o 


(     «o6     ) 


! 


n 


obferve  (and  undoubtedly  with  a  great  deal  of 
pleafure)  that  exertions  of  fuch  a  horrid  tenden- 
cy have  not,  latterly,  had  the  fame  effed  there, 
that  they  have  here  j  but  you  niuft  ncverthelefs 
agree,  that  it  was  as  .prudent  and  as  juftihable  in 
the  government  of  Great  Britain,  to  profecute 
thofe  who  were  endeavouring  to  kindle  the  (lames 
of  civil  war  in  Scotland,  as  it  is  in  the  govern- 
ment of  the  United  States  to  profecute  the  men, 
who,  for  a  fimilar  crime,  arc  now  in  Philadel- 
phia jail,  waiting  their  trials.  As  to  the  taxes 
in  Great  Britain  they  are  heavy,  and  I  believe 
in  my  foul  it  is  in  their  very  nature  to  be  heavy, 
as  much  as  it  is  in  the  nature  of  lead  ;  for,  the 
people  complain  of  their  weight  not  only  there, 
but  here,  and  every  where  elfe.  You  will,  per- 
haps, like  many  ether  compaflionate  people,  feel 
a  good  deal  of  anxiety  about  the  national  debt  of 
Great  Britain,  and  may  poflibly  have  your  fears 
of  a  general  bankruptcy  :  but,  fulfer  me  to  cauti- 
on you  againfl  an  excefs  of  fenfibility  ;  for,  though 
companion  is,  in  itfelf  amiable,  it  degenerates 
into  weaknefs,  when  lavifhed  on  an  unworthy 
objeft  :  nay,  it  even  looks  meddling,  if  not 
chirilh,  to  be  eternally  exprcfling  a  follcitude 
for  people  who  do  not  feem  at  all  fenfible  of  your 
kindncfs.  Only  look  at  the  condudl  of  their 
Merchants,  for  example,  towards  Mr.  Dayton  : 
we  have  not  heard,  that  they  have  expreifed  the 
lead  gratitude  to  that  honcll  gentleman  for  his 
kind  motion  for  putting'afide  about  four  or  five 
millions  of  their  dollars,  in  a  fafe  corner,  to 
preferve  them  from  the  Hanover  Rats  and  the 
fcrambling  clutches  of  Billy  Pitt  !  If  I  were  in 
the  place  of  the  honourable  Member  from  New- 
Jcrfey  I  think  it  would  be  a  lelTon  to  me  never 


i! 


of 
n- 


in 
ite 

n- 


(     >C)7     ) 

to  meddle  with  their  afTairs  again.  Such  a  per- 
verfe  ftiil'-necked  race  ought  to  be  left  to  their  late. 
All  we  have  to  do,  is,  to  take  care  that  they  do  not 
get  into  our  debt,  and  then  let  them  break  as  foon 
as  they  will.  Humanity  requires  that  we  Ihould 
pity  our  diftrefTed  fellow  creatures,  but  it  docs 
not  oblige  us  to  expofe  ourfelves  to  their  contempt. 

In  defence  of  the  condudl  of  the  gentlemen  en- 
coitragers  of  The  Political  Progrefs  of'  Britain^  it 
has  been  roundlv  aflerted,  that  there  exifts  a  Mo- 
narchy  Party  in  the  United  States,  and  that  eve- 
ry thing  tending  to  render  it  odious  is  neccifary 
and  laudable ;  and  that,  confequently,  it  was 
no  more  than  fair  play  to  borrow,  or  hire,  the 
pen  of  a  needy  foreigner  to  lampoon  the  govern- 
ment and  conftitution  of  his  own  country.  But, 
whoever  will  give  themfelvc-s  the  trouble  to  o- 
pen  their  eyes,  or  make  ufe  of  a  very  little  re- 
colleftion,  will  be  convi/aced,  I  fancy,  that  there 
is  no  reafon  for  alariii  on  this  account. 

Our  democrats  are  continually  crying  fliame 
on  the  fatellites  of  Royalty,  for  carrying  on  a 
Crufade  againft  Liberty  ;  when  the  fad  is,  the 
fatellitCrf  of  Liberty  *  are  carrying  on  a  Cru- 
facie  againft  Royalty.  If  one  could  recollect  all 
their  valorous  deeds,  on  this  fide  the  water, 
fmce  the  beginning  of  1793,  they  would  make 
a  hiftory  far  furpafling  that  of  Tom  Thumb  or 


'\ 


*  Take  care,  reader,  how  you  confound  terms  here.  Li' 
herty^  according  to  the  Democratic  Diftionary,  does  not 
mean  freedom  from,  opprejfion ;  it  is  a  very  comprchenfive 
term,  fignifying  among  other  things,  Jlavery^  rohberyf 
murder^  and  blafphemy.  Citizen  David  painter  to  the 
Propagandc,  has  reprefented  Liberty  under  the  form  of  a 
Dragon  ;  it  is,  I  fuppofe,  for  this  reafon  that  our  democrats 
cry  out  againft  St.,  George  as  ♦*  the  moil  dangerous  of  Li- 
**  berticidcs."  ^ 


I 


" 


(  108  ) 

Jack  the  Giant  Killer,  The  Aurora^  and  two  or 
three  other  prints  of  that  (lamp,  have  ferved 
them  by  way  of  Backers-on  :  they  have  been, 
and  are  yet,  the  Saint  Ber^-ards  and  Peter  the 
Hermits  of  the  Crufade. 

When  they  found  the  government  was  not  to 
be  bulh'ed  into  a  war,  they  were  upon  the  point 
of  declaring  it  themfelves  againll  the  coalefced 
Monarchs,  fo  well  known  for  their  depredations 
on  the  purfes  of  all    Chriilendom,  and   againfl 

,  that  old  ruffian  Harry  the  Eighth,  who  *.  a  fort 
ot  fetter-on  of  the  Vv hole  pack.  And  though  this 
refolvewa>  not  put  into  (xecurion,  out  of  refpe£l 
for  the  inviolable  and  iacrcJ  perion  of  his  Majefty 
of  Clubs,  they  immediaUfly  "  let  flip  the  dogs 
*'  of  war"  at  every  thing  elfj  that  bore  the  name 

.  or  marks  of  Royalty. 

Their  firft  objcdl  of  attack  was  the  Stage,  E- 
very  Royal  or  noble  ch.arader  wan   to  be  driven 

'  into  everlalh'ng  exile,  or  at  lead,  none  fuch 
•was  ever  to  he  introduced  except  by  way  of  de- 
gradation. The  words  your  Majcfty,  My  Lord, 
and  the  like,  were  held  to  be  as  ofifenfive  to  the 
clafle  ears  of  Republicans,  as  filks,  geld  lace, 
painted  cheeks,  and  powdered  periwigs  to  iheir 
eyes.  In  (hort  the  hi'^heft  and  lowefl  titles  wer^^ 
to  be  citizen  and  citefs  and  the  dreffes  were  all 
to  be  a  la  mode  de  Paris. 

That  the  Theatre  might  not  fuffer  for  want 
of  pieces  adapted  to  the  reformed  tafte,  the  re- 
formers   had   the   goodnefs    to  propose    William 

7ell^   and  feveral    others    equally  amufing - 

William  was  to  be  modernized  :  in  place  of 
fhooting  the  Governor  with  a  bow  and  ar- 
row, he  was  to  flab  him  in  the  guts  with  a  dag- 
ger, cut  off  his  head,  and  carry  it  round  the  Stage 


(     109     ) 

wpon  a  pihc^  >vhile    the  mufic  was  to  play  the 
Murderer's  Hymn  and  Ha,  ca'ira. 

It  is  hard!y  neceflary  to  fay,  that  the  gentle- 
tnen  and  ladies  of  the  biilkin  (though  they  have 
taken  for  motto,  Vivat  Refpubtica  *  )  turned  a 
deaf  ear  to  all  innovations  of  this  kind.  It  was 
no  eafy  maiter  to  perfuade  people  who  had 
been  kings  and  queens  from  their  infancy,  to 
turn  kennel-rakers  and  cut  throats  all  at  once. 
In  vain  did  the  Crufaders  reprefent  to  them,  that 
their  condu6l  was  inconfiftent  with  their  motto, 
and  that  their  vanity  was  like  that  of  the  Afs 
loaded  with  Relick^.  Expoflulation  and  me- 
naces were  vain  :  after  having  ftrutted  fo  long  in 
furbelowed  brocades  and  White  Chapel  dia- 
monds, th  y  felt  themfelves  by  no  means  difpof- 
ed  to  go  (linking  about  the  fcene  in  an  a — clout. 

Some  people  may  think,  that  this  is  all  inven- 
tion ;  but  if  they  think  it  worth  while  to  look 
over  the  Gazettes  I  have  mentioned  above, 
they  will  find  that  the  merit  of  it  does  not  fall 
to  my  lliare. 

To  make  the  reader  amends  for  WiUiam  Tell^ 
I  am  agoing  to  treat  him  with  a  delicate  mor- 
fel  indeed  ;  and,  which  adds  to  its  merit,  it  is 
not  in  every  body's  hands,  the  publication,  from 
which  I  have  extrafted  it,  being,  thank  God,  but 
Very  little  known, 


*  Thefc,  I  am  told,  arc  cabalifllcal  words  of  amazing 
virtue.  It  was  my  intention  to  give  the  reader  a  fatisfafto- 
fy  explanation  of  them  :  but,  though  I  have  confultcd  all 
the  tnoft  renowned  Caballfts  among  the  democrats,  I  have 
not  been  able  to  procure  it.  Some  fay  that  repeating  them 
about  nine  hundred  times  every  other  day,  will  charpe  a 
high-flying  Tory,  into  a  Haunch  Republican.  Others  fay, 
they  have  no  virtue  at  all ;  and  that  they  mean  neither  more 
Uor  lefs  ihan— -Huzza  for  the  Jlronge/i, 


(     no     ) 

"PHILADELPHIA. 


f 


«( 


"  A  new  Song  called  the  Guillotine,  Sunpj 
at  the  celebration  oi  the  fourt/j  o/yuly^  by  a 
*'  number  of  French  and  American  citizens  at 
*'  Hamburgh.  Writen  by  the  celebrated  Mr. 
•*  Barlow,  who  was  then  at  that  place. 

«<  God  favc  the  Guillotine, 
"  Till  Em^I.tntPs   Kiti''  and  ^ff.\'n, 
"  Her  power  Ihall  prove  ; 

**  'Till  each  anointed  knob 
••  AHorda  .1  clip()inp  job, 
**  L.ct  no  viL'  lnilt'.r  rob, 
»♦    I'hc  Guillotine. 

•*  Fanne  let  tliy  tnmipot  found, 
♦*  Tell  all  the  world  around,  ... 

How  Cnj)d  fell ; 


(i 


•*   And  whtn  gT:at  George* s  poll 
«'  Shall  in  the  bafl<ct  roll, 
L,et  mercy  then  controul, 
«  The  Guillotine. 


u 


"  When  all  the  fcepircd  crew 
**  Have  paid  their  homage,  due  •*' 
"  The  Guillotine, 

*'  Let   freedom's  flag  advance,  , 

"  'Till  all  the  world  like  France, 
*'  O'er  tyrants'  gravea  fliall  dance     j " 
'  "  And  Peace  begin." 

With  refpe£t  to  this  tender  madrigal,  v/e  are 
at  a  lofs  which  to  admire  moft  ;  the  ftyle  and  fe- 
timentsof  the  "  celebrated  Author,"  *  .  the  de- 


*  It  wovdd  be  worth  the  reader's  while  to  enquire  whe- 
ther this  celebrated  author  has  never  employed  his  poetic  ta- 
lent in  making  an  addition  to  Dr.  Watt's  verfion  of  the 
Pfalms  ?  If  thit;  fhould  appear  to  be  the  cafe,  it  mud  be 
allowed  he  is  In  a  fair  way  to  become  an  iinivsrfid  genius, 
and  an  honour  to  his  country. 


(    n«    ) 


le- 

e- 
ta- 
he 
be 


llcacy  of  the  Editor,  or  he  taflc  of  hh  readers. 
I  fay  /jis  readers,  for  I  liioukl  be  forry  to  think 
it  was  the  tarte  of  the  inhabitants,  in  general, 
of  Philadelphia.  However,  1  think  the  reade. 
will  agree  with  me,  that  at  a  time  vlien  fiich  a 
picee  as  thir.  could  poilibly  be  admitted  into  a 
public  print,  there  could  be  no  neceflity  for 
a  publication  of  SiUcmys  Complotnt :  to  bring  it 
out  after  fuch  a  tit  bit  as  this,  was  as  bad  as  ferv- 
ing  up  a  mefs  of  burgoo  after  a  cramberry  tart. 

That  there  fliould  be  found  amongd  us  men 
fo  vindictive  as  to  pray  for  the  murder  of  the 
King  and  Queen  of  England,  people  who  had 
offended  us,  is  not  fo  very  alhonlfhing  ;  unfortu- 
nately there  are  men  of  that  (lamp  in  all  coun- 
tries, and  confequently,  we  muft  expert  to  find 
fome  of  that  defcription  amongfl  thofe  who  live 
by  entertaining  the  public.  It  is  not  therefore 
more  wonderful  that  fuch  a  feniiment  fliould 
find  its  way  into  a  Newfpaper  than  that  it  fliould 
be  conceived.  But  that  there  fliould  be  found  a 
number  ol  Americans ^  or  even  onc^  capable  of  rejoic- 
ing and  laughing  at  the  tragic  fall  of  the  unfor- 
tunate Louis  XVI.  is  a  fa£t  of  fuch  a  horrid  na- 
ture that  we  wifli  not  to  believe  our  eyes  and  ears. 
Who  is  not  fenfible  of  the  efforts,  the  mighty, 
the  fuccefsful  efforts  made  by  that  Monarch  in 
favour  of  thefe  States  \  Who  is  not  fenfible,  that 
to  thofe  efforts  America  owes  her  Independence  ? 
Every  one  is  fenfible  of  it  ;  and  it  is  for  this 
reafon,  that  all  parties  join  in  celebrating  the 
6th  of  February,  the  anniverfary  of  the  conclu- 
fion  of  the  Treaty  of  Alliance  between  Louis  XVI. 
and  the  United  States.*  Recollect,  reader, 
'      ■--  .  ^     •      A  •  ■"  .     .         ■      <  -  ■ 

*  I  fay  Louis  and  thcUaltrd  States;  for  It  was  /r,  anc!  he 


(       "2       ) 

that  the  fong  above  quoted,  was  fung  on  the 
fourth  of  July ;  on  the  anniverfary  of  that  Inde- 
pendence we  boaft  of  as  a  fovereign  good.  Re- 
colled  that  a  number  of  Americans,  aflembled 
to  rejoice  on  account  of  this  bleffing,  called  to  ihe 
univerfe  at  the  fame  time,  to  witnefs  their  joy 
at  the  murder  of  him  who  conferred  it  !  This 
was  all  that  was  wanted  to  the  humihation  of 
the  houfe  of  Bourbon  and  to  the  revenge  of  its 
Rival.  Poor  Louis  might  deferve  fomething  of 
this  kind  in  the  eyes  of  Englifhmen  ;  by  them 
he  might  expe£l  his  memory  would  be  execrated* 
Could  he  now  look  from  the  grave,  what  would 
be  his  aflonifhment  to  fee  them  among:  the  firft 
to  defend  it,  and  fome  <l1  us  among  the  firfl:,  a- 
monjj;  the  very  firfl,  to  te?r  it  to  pieces  ?  Could 
this  inaocent,  this  virtuous,  this  injured  Prince, 
now  behold  the  ungrateful  hell-hounds,  that, 
from  all  quarters  of  the  world,  affail  his  reputa- 
tion, would  he  not  exclaim,  like  Cosfar  whea 
he  faw  the  dagger  of  his  beloved  Brutus,—— 
and  you  too  Americans  ? 

Let  us  leave  thefe  Bacchanalians,  whofe  beve- 
yage  is  the  blood  of  their  benefadlors,  and  return 
to  our  Crufaders  ;  though  I  am  afraid  we  fhali 
gain  but  little  by  the  change. 

alone.  There  were  no  Fayettes,  no  Robefpierres,  no  Barreres 
in  thofe  days  :  the  king  was  abfolute,  and  to  him  was  the 
alliance  owing  and  to  nobody  elfe.  He  was  then  as  much  and 
more,  an  abfolute  monarch  than  he  was  at  the  beginning  of 
the  French  Revolution  ;  yet  none  of  us  ever  dreamed  of  call- 
ing him  a  defpoty  a  tyrant^  •*  an  ermined  monjler.  '  I'he  Con- 
grefs,  the  very  Congrefs  that  declared  us  independent,  de- 
clared him  to  be  our  great  and  good  ally,  our  deliverer ;  and 
not  a  word  about  defpotlfm.  Whence  come  all  thefe  oppro- 
brious terms  now  I  From  the  ungrateful  hearts  of  thofe  wha 
9iftke  ufe  of  them. 


*  ■ 


_f       •      (     "3     )    - 

Their  next  attack  was  on  all  piflures,  carved 
work,  and  ftucco  work.  At  the  diftance  of  a 
few  miles  from  the  Metropolis,  a  Tavern-Keeper, 
who,  about  a  dozen  years  ago,  hoifted  the  ^een 
of  France^  to  attract  cuftom  to  his  houfe,  found 
it  necefl-iiy  lad  fummer,  to  fever  her  head  from 
her  body,  and  fet  the  blood  ftreaming  down  her 
garments.* 

Who  can  have  forgotten  the  card,  fent  to  the 
Clergy  and  veflry  of  Chrift's  Church  ?  This  card 
begged,  or  rather  demanded,  of  the  perfons  to 
whom  it  was  addreiTed,  to  remove  the  image 
and  crown  of  George  II.  and  to  be  as  quick  as 
poiTible  in  doing  it,  for  fear  it  fhould  endanger 
the  falvation  of  the  citizens ;  "  for,**  fays  the 
card,  "  that  mark  of  infamy  has  a  tendency  to 
"  keep  many  young  and  virtuous  men  from  attend- 
''  ing  public  worfhip.** 

For  my  part,  I  look  upon  the  deftruftion  of 
this  image  and  Crown  as  an  event  of  about  as 
much  confequence  to  the  citizens  of  Philadelphia 
as  the  deftru6lion  of  the  Swifs,-f  at  the  door  of  their 
Library,  would  be.  The  church  is  full  as  well 
without  it,  as  with  it.    I  have  frequented  Chrifl's 


'  •    I 


trea 


*  The  reader  will  undoubtedly  feel  a  confiderable  relief 
•wKen  he  hears  that  this  complaifant  creature  was  a  patrtatic 
Englifhinan,     But  who  were  his  cuftomers  ?  ,■, 

f  This  image  has  obtained  the  name  of  the  Siv'tfs  for  two 
reafons :  Firft,  becaufe  the  citizens  of  Switzerland  are  gen- 
erally employed  by  other  nations  in  the  capacity  of  Porters; 
and  fecondly,  becaufe  their  motto  is,  *'  Point  d'  argent, 
point  de  Sivifs  ;'*  in  Englifh,  "  No  pay  no  Swi/s.**  I  leave 
the  reader  to  determine  whether  the  name  be  applicable  qr  no 
to  the  image  in  queftion. 


It. 


Pi< 


I 
I 

J 


IV 


l*  .■,'!<■■■ 


(      "4     ) 

Cliiirch  for  near  about  thirty  years,  without  e- 
vrr  obferviug  that  fuch  a  thirig  was  on  the  walls 
of  it ;  nor  did  I  ever  imagine  that  fny  falvaiwn 
could  he  endangered  by  the  form  oi  a  lump  of  (luc- 
co.  In  this  afi'air,  one  would  have  wiflied  on- 
ly, for  the  fake  of  thofe  who  made  the  requeil, 
that  it  had  not  been  made  at  fo  unfortunate  a 
juniflure.  It  was  almoft  literally  biting  off  the 
nofe  to  be  revenged  on  the  face.  George  II.  who 
died,  God  reft  his  foul,  in  1760,  could  not  help 
Sir  Charles  Gray's  taking  the  French  Ulands, 
Colonel  Brathwaitc's  taking  Pondicherry,  Lord 
Hood's  taking  Corfica,  and  burning  the  arfenals 
and  Fleet  at  loulon,  nor  Lord  Howe's  unmer- 
ciful inhuman  baftinado  of  the  Carmagnole  Fleet 
off  Ufliant,  all  which  happened  in  1794;  yet 
1  believe,  'lobody  doubted,  that  if  nothing  of 
this  kind  had  taken  place,  the  "  young  and  vir- 
*'  tuous  men**  would  have  felt  no  qualms  of  con- 
fcicnce  on  account  of  the  image  and  crown.  If 
the  poor  image  could  have  fp(iken,  it  certainly 
would  have  remonftrated  againft  fuch  an  a€t  of 
n?anife(l:  injuffice ;  an  acl  tranf^reffing  all  laws 
both  human  and  divine.  For,  I  believe  it  is 
'a  principle  eftablifhed  in  law,  that  thirty  years,  if 
i^ot  lefs,  of  uninterrupted  poffeffion,  ccnftitutes  a 
right ;  and,  though  we  have  heard  of  the  fms  of 
the  fathers  beings  vifited  upon  the  children,  it 
was  left  for  thefe  ^^  young  and  virtuous  men**  to 
•ftnd  out  the  jaftice  of  vifiting  the  fins  of  the 
children  upon  the  fathers. 

Of  a  piece  with  this  heroic  a6lion  was  that  of 
the  Democrats  of  Charlcjion^  South  Carolina, 
when  thjy  precipitated  the  flatue  of  the  late 
Lord  Chatham  from  its  pedeflal,  and  bragged  in 
the  gazettes  of  having  fevered  the  head  from  the 


\\ 


(     "5     ) 


■AX' 


body.  If  one  were  to  a(k  thefe  wife  acres,  M'hat 
honour  or  profit  they  could  promife  themfelves 
in  this  triumph  over  a  piece  of  marble,  1  wonder 
what  would  be  their  anfwer.  It  was  not  the  En- 
glifh  that  placed  it  there  ;  it  was  themielves* 
It  was  an  idol  they  had  raifed  with  their  own 
hands.  Did  they  expcft  to  find  it,  like  the  man's 
wooden  God,  (tuffed  with  gold  and  filver  ^  Had 
this  been  the  cafe,  and  had  their  expedation  been 
well  founded,  the  profit  of  the  enterprize  might 
have  kept  them  in  countenance  :  but,  as  it  A'as, 
their  fally  of  fans-culottifm  has  produced  them 
nothing  but  derifion  ,  has  fixed  them  as  a  mark, 
"  for  the  hand  of  fcorn  to  point  its  flow  and 
*'  moving  finger  at."  People  compare  them  to 
the  child  who  fights  with  his  man  of  clay,  and 
calls  out  to  his  playmates  to  admire  his  bravery. 
No  wonder  that  the  Jacobin  Club  at  Paris  fhould 
objeft  to  the  adoption  of  ninnies  like  thefe. 

I  will  not  fatigue  the  reader  with  any  more  of 
thefe  feats  of  modern  chivalry  ;  what  I  have  here 
related  will,  I  think,  be  fufficient  to  prove,  that 
the  pidures  of  half  a  dozen  old  kings,  painted 
with  a  C'edonian  mop,  were  by  no  means  ne- 
ceffary  to  frighten  the  people  into  Democratic 
principles. 

I  now  come  to  an  epoch  of  American  fanf-cu- 
lottifm,  that  ought  not  to  be  forgotten  in  hafte. 
I  mean  the  beginning  of  the  Weltern  Rebellion. 
When  the  back-door  Clubs  firfl  received  the 
news,  they  put  a  Janus*s  face  upon  the  matter  : 
they  pretended  not  to  approve,  altogether,  of 
the  hojiile  operations  of  their  "  Weftern  Breth- 
"  ren  ;"  but  at  the  fame  time  they  took  good 
care  to  declare,  that  they  would  ne'ver  ceaje  to 
^ppofe  the  law  which  had  given  them  umbrage.  The 


W¥ 


-»i 


n-v; 


(     t.6     ) 

manoeuvres  that  were  employed  to  prevent  the 
Militia  of  Pennfylvania  from  turning  out,  and 
the  farcafms  that  were  thrown  out  on  the  Jer- 
fey  Militia,  only  becaufe  they  did  turn  out,  are 
frefti  in  every  one's  memory.  As  is  the  ever- 
memorable  petition  that  was  prefented  to  the 
Houfe  of  Reprefentatives  of  the  State  of  Penn- 
fylvania, on  the  6th  of  September  laft.  The  Le- 
giflature  was  no  fooner  met,  for  the  fpecial 
purpofe  of  enforcing  the  execution  of  one  excife 
law,  than  they  were  befought  to  afTifl:  in  oppo-  * 
fmg  the  execution  of  another  excife  law  !  The 
petition  was  an  appeal  to  the  Legiflature,  not 
from  an  inferior,  but  from  a  fuperior  Legifla- 
ture ;  and,  which  is  perhaps  the  moft  incon- 
gruous of  all  the  incongruities  that  ever  were 
heard  of;  at  the  head  of  the  appellants  was  the 
Prefident  of  one  branch  of  that  very  Legiflature 
from  which  they  were  appealing  !  !  Had  the 
Prefideat  of  the  United  States  joined  Citizen 
Genet,  iu  his  appeal  to  the  people,  the  ftep 
would  not  have  been  more  ridiculous 

No  body  can  doubt,  that  the  fcheme  of  the 
De.riocrats  was,  by  means  like  thcfe,  to  deaden 
the  limbs  of  Government,  and  then  feize  the  reins 
themfelves.  But  fuccefs  was  dubious ;  they 
therefore  proceeded  with  caution.  Look  at  and 
admire  their  conduft,  from  this  time,  'till  they 
faw  a  fufficient  force  ready  to  march  againft 
their  "  Wefterr  Brethren."  You  will  find  them 
lying  on  their  arms,  fdent  and  fnug,  but  the 
infiant  fuch  a  force  appeared,  adieu  all  relation- 
Jhip  :  the  poor  devils  were  in  a  moment  tranf- 
formed  from  "  Wefl:ern  Brethren"  into  "  Infur- 
gents,"  and  (Oh,  monftrous  transformation  !) 
even  into  "  Royaliils !"  If  this  be  the  way  they 


,1 


(    i'7    ) 

treat  their  oun  flefh  and  blood,  what  have  llran- 
gers  to  exped  at  their  hands  ? 

Let  this  be  a  warning  to  you,  all  you  undcr- 
flrappers  of  Democratic  Clubs  ;  leave  oft*  your 
bawHng  and  your  toafting,  go  home  and  fell 
your  fu^ar  and  your  ftiuff,  and  leave  the  care 
of  "  Pojierity**  to  other  heads ;  for,  when  the 
hour  of  difcomfit  arrives,  your  Jack  Straws  and 
your  C.  Foxes  will  leave  you  in  the  lurch.  When 
you  get  your  carcaffes  ballinadoed,  or,  which  is 
far  worfe,  penned  up  within  the  walls  of  a  jail, 
they  will  feoff  at  you,  as  the  devil  ever  does 
at  a  baffled  finner.  This  is  an  article  of  their 
creed.  Do  you  want  a  proof  of  it  ?  Look  at 
their  condudt  towards  their  venerable  founder. 
Citizen  Genet :  no  fooner  had  the  poor  citizen 
made  his  political  exit,  than  they  began  to 
*'  dance  on  his  grave,"  as  their  brother  Barlow 
did  on  that  of  Louis  XVI.  However,  all  their 
ungrateful  efforts,  all  their  unnatural  malice  has 
not  been  able  to  injure  their  immortal  Sire. — 
Though  baffled  and  perfecuted  on  this  fide  the 
Styx,  he  has  bribed  old  Charon  to  ferry  him  over 
into  the  Ifland  of  B'ifs,  where  he  may,  uninter- 
rupted by  tormenting  Ariftocrats,  fip  the  live 
long  day,  and  the  live  long  night  too,  at  the 
lovely  ftream,  flowing  from  the  pure  fountain  of 
the  pureft  democracy. 

But  to  return ;  our  democrats  had  another 
view  in  ftigmatizing  their  "  weftern  brethren** 
for  Royalifts,  befides  that  of  difowning  them. 
They  faw  a  good  opportunity  of  throwing  the 
blame  on  the  fhoulders  of  Great  Britain,  at  the 
fame  tim«  that  they  fhifted  it  from  their  own. 
Thus,  by  a  flroke  of  addrefs  peculiar  to  them- 


If 


ll 


n 


(   118  )  - 

felves  they  turned  misfortune  to  advantage  :  this 
was  making  the  befl  of  a  bad  market  with  a  ven- 
geance!  Hence  all  the  grave  alarming  accounts 
ot  people's  crying  out  :  "  King  George  forever;'* 
and  of  billets  being  ''  ituck  upon  trees  with, 
*'  Britijh  freedom  luill  never  opprefs  yoit.'^  Billets 
flunk  upon  trees  !  Like  thofe  of  Orlando  and 
Rofalind,  I  fuppofe.  ,  ,5.   ^ 

.  ^       •*  Until  the  tree  (hall  quit  the  rind, 
\  *'   I'll  never  q.iit  my  Rufaliud."  . 

■  .  . 
This  is  very  pretty  in  making  love,  but  it  is  a 
romantic  way  of  carrying  on  Treafon  and  Re- 
bellion, and  feems  to  agree  but  very  ill  with  the 
language  of  thofe  gentle  fwains  airembled  at  Par- 
kinfon's  Ferry.  '  '  •        :,, 

I  mufl  be  excufed  alfo,  if  I  do  not  give  full 
credit  to  what  the  Governor  of  Pennfylvania  af- 
ferted  on  this  fubjed,  when  he  was  harranguing 
the  militia  officers  to  perfuade  them  to  aflenible 
their  quotas,  for  the  purpofe  of  marching  againft 
the  "  Weftern  Brethren.'*  '«^  Liften,"  faid  he, 
to  the  language  of  the  Infurgents^  and  your 
fpirit  will  rife  with  indignation.*  They  not 
only  affert  that  certain  Jaws  fhall  be  repealed, 
let  the  fenfe  of  the  majority  be  what  it  may, 
but  they  threaten  us  with  the  eftablifliment  ot 
an  independent  government,  or  a  return  to 
the  allegiance  of  Great  Britain^'* 
Mofl;  people  thought  this  W2is  2i  (wit /hot  ;  but, 
they  forgot,  that  he  faid,  in  the  fame  harrangue, 
that,  ''  from  defers  in  the  militia  fyftem,  or 
^^  ./ome  other  unfortunate  caufe,  the  attempts  to  ob- 

*  Ah,  Sir!  ought  the  officers  and  foldiers  of  the  State 
of  Pennsylvania  to  feel  indignation  againll  nobody  but  the 
ik/uded''  Weftern  Brethren  ?" 


>'iwi 


(     ««9     ) 

<'  tain  the  quota  of  militia  by  regular  drafts 
'*  bad  failed,'*  If  they  had  recollcOed,  that, 
under  fuch  circumltances  the  end  of  an  har- 
rangue  was  to  "  Itir  men's  bloods,"  and  not  to 
be  very  nice  in  the  flatement  of  fads,  they  would 
not  have  been  furprifed,  that  our  Solomon  (  I 
can  have  no  intention  to  hint,  that  the  wife  Go- 
vernor has  ever  had  three  hundred  concubines  at 
a  time  ;  human  nature  cannot  ftand  that,  now 
a  days)  they  would  not,  I  fay,  have  been  fur- 
prifed, that  our  Solomon  fliould  choofe  Great 
Britain  as  a  fpur.  '' 

Reader,  when  you  were  a  little  boy,  did  you 
never  carry  on  a  fecret  ^correfpondence  with  the 
pies  and  tarts  ;  and  when  by  the  rattling  of 
the  plates,  or  fome  other  accident  you  were  like 
to  be  caught  at  it,  did  you  never  raife  a  hue  and 
cry  againd  the  poor  dogs  and  cats  ?  Thofe  who 
look  upon  the  conduft  of  our  Democrats  as  un- 
natural,   forget  their  own  little  roguifh  tricks. 

I  will  venture  to  fay  that  there  are  not  five 
perfons  in  the  United  States,  poffefling  a  degree 
cf  underftanding  fuperior  to  that  of  the  brute 
creation,  who  believe  that  the  Rebels  have  ever 
had  from  firfl:  to  laft,  the  leafl  idea  of  feeking 
protedion  from  the  BritiOi.  From  whence 
comes  the  probability  ?  All  their  partizans  in 
this  quarter  were  to  be  found  among  the  revilers 
of  Great  Britain.  Read  their  refolves,  and  fee 
if  you  can  fmd  any  thing  that  leaves  them  a  pof- 
fibility  of  fraternizing  with  the  Britifli.  Befides, 
can  any  body  fuppofe,  that  the  Britifh  would 
have  accepted  of  them  ?  Unlefs,  indeed,  they  had 
had  them  in  Europe,  where  they  might  have 
employed  them  as  a  "  forlorn  hope  '/'  as  the 
Democrats  have  the  poor  Author  of  the  Political 


./ 1' 


•/ 


':.^ 


(       12C       ) 

Progrefs.  I  fancy,  if  they,  with  all  their  parti- 
zans,  and  Tom  the  Tinker  and  his  prevaricating 
Coadjutor  at  their  head,  had  went  and  offered 
themlelves,  bodies  and  fouls,  to  Old  foxy  Dor- 
cheller,  he  would  have  faid,  as  Louis  XI.  did 
to  the  Genoefe  :  "  Vous  vous  donnez  a  mot,  et 
"  nwi,  je  vous  donne  au  DiabteJ'*'* 

I  afk  any  reafonable  man,  what  they  could 
poflihly  expe£l  to  do  among  the  Briti(h  ?  The 
Britifli  have  lb  many  of  this  ftamp  already,  that 
they  are  fending  off  (hip  loads  to  Botany  Bay 
every  month.  Could  a  fellow,  for  inftance  i- 
magine,  that  having  been  the  fecrctary  of  a  back 
door  club,  would  recommend  him  to  the  poft  of 
fecretary  in  Canada  ?  Prudence  would  prevent 
the  employment  of  one  whofe  only  talent  is,  bloW' 
ing  hot  and  cold  with  the  fame  mouth,  bccaufe  fuch 
a  perfon  might  become  the  tool  of  every  intriguing 
foreigner,  and  by  his  prevarication,  might  em- 
broil the  whole  government.  Would  any  one 
(except  one  like  himfelf)  put  fuch  a  man  in  a 
poil  of  confidence  ?  I  put  this  queflion  to  every 
thinking  American,  and  particularly  to  every 
Pennfylvanian. 

And  with  refped  to  Tom  the  Tinker  himfelf, 
(for  he  is,  on  every  account,  entitled  to  the  pre- 
eminence), what  could  he  expedl  among  the 
Britifli  ?  If  he  were  to  play  any  of  his  drunken 
tinker-like  tricks  amongft  them,  it  would  not  be 
begging  pardon  that  would  bring  him  off.  If 
he  were  to  tell  them  that  his  "  hammer  was 
"  up,  and  his  ladle  hot,  and  that  he  would  not 
"  travel  the  country  for  nothing,^*  I  am  miftaken 
if  they  would  not  pay  him  off  with  a  good  five 
hundred  lafnes,  well  counted  ;  for  the  Britifh 
are  pundual  in  paying  their  debts.     They  would 

*  You  give  yourfelves  to  me,    and  I  give  you  to  the  devil." 


(      121      ) 

teach  Kim  how  to  fet  people  together  by  the  ears 
another  time. 

Could  a  f©t  like  Torn  imapjine  that  the  Cana- 
dian ladles  would  have  iailen  in  love  with  him, 
becaule  his  fcull  had  often  been  decorated  with 
a  liberty  Cap,  to  tellify  his  attachment  to  the  na- 
tion from  which  they  are  defcended  ?  No  ;  the 
ladies,  all  the  world  over,  are,  from  long  expe- 
rience, too  well  convinced  of  the  truth  of  Gold- 
fmith's  maxim:  "  \  man  who  is  eternally  vo- 
"  ciferatinpr  liberty  !  liberty  !  is  generally,  in  his 
"  own  family-^  a  mofl  cruel  and  inhuman  tyrant.** 

The  truth  is,  thofe  among  us  who  have  made 
the  mod  noife,  and  have  expreflfed   the  mofl  ran- 
cour  againfl:   Great   Britain,  feem   to  have  done 
it  only  to  cover  their  enmity  to  the   Federal  Go- 
vernment, and  confeqaently  to  their  country,   if 
we  may  with  propriety  call  it  their  country.     Let 
any  man  take  a  review  of  their  conduct  fmce  the 
beginning  of  the  prefent  European  war,  and  fee 
if  this  obfervation  is  not  uniformly  true.     It  was 
they  who  raifed  fuch  a  clamour  againfl  the  Pre- 
fident's  wife  Proclamation  of  Neutralitv  ;  it  was 
they  who  encouraged   an  infolent   and  intriguing 
foreigner  to  fet  the  laws  of  the  Union  at  defiance, 
and  to  treat  the  Supreme  Executive  Authority  as 
if  he  had  been  a  Talien  or  a  Barrere,  or  the  Prefi- 
dent  of  nothing  but  a  Democratic  or  Jacobin  Club; 
it  was  they  who  brought  the  vexations  and  de- 
predations  on   the   commerce,  and  then  Guillo- 
tined in  effigy  the  AmbalTador  Extraordinary,  the 
Angel  of  Peace,  who  went  to  repair  their  fault ; 
finally,  it' was  they  who  fanned   the   embers  of 
Rebellion  in  the  Weft  into  a  flame,  and    caufed 
fourteen   or  fifteen  thoufand  men  to  be  taken 

9.. 


V  ,•• 


» 

U 


(       122      ) 

fromtheirhomeSjto  undergo  amofl  fatiguing  cam'* 
paign,  at  the  cxpencc  of  a  million  and  an  hall"  of 
Dollars  to  the  iJnited  States.  Ihe  fame  perverfc 
clan  that  heroically  hurled  down  the  Statue  of 
Lord  Cliatham,  and  manfully  made  war  upon  an 
Image  and  a  Crown,  endeavoured  to  introduce  a 
law  to  prevent  the  Prefident  of  the  United  States 
iroin  beiri?^  re-elcded,  and  openly  declared  (by  the 
iifual  vehicle  of  their  manlteftovS,  a  gazette)  that 
it  was  improper  to  fend  the  Chief  Judge  as  Ani- 
baiVador  Extraordinary  to  r^ngland,  becaul'e  they 
might  want  him  here  to — try  the  Prefident  1* 

It  is  rrthcr,  an  aukward  circumda'^ce,  I  muft 
confefs,  that  the  meddling  enemies  oi  the  Britifli 
iiovernment  and  of  that  of  the  United  States 
ihould  be  the  fame,  the  fact  is  however  indifput- 
able,  as  will  appear  in  a  minute. 

For  proof,  1  like  always  to  have  recourfe  to 
what  has  appeared  in  print  ;  words  arc  wind  ; 
a  man  fays  a  thing  in  earneft  that  he  retraQs  by 
turning  it  into  a  joke.  Befides,  we  fay  a  hun- 
dred things  in  the  heat  of  argument  or  palllon, 
that  we  do  not  think  :  but  writing,  and  particu- 
larly writing  for  the  prefs,  is  a  deliberate  a6t. 
"When  a  perfon  fits  down  to  write,  his  mind  mull 
be  in  fome  fort  compofed  ;  time  is  necelTary  for 
the  arrangement  of  his  ideas  ;  what  he  has  writ- 
ten mud  be  examined  with  care  ;  he  augments, 
curtails,  corrects  and  improves.     All  this  natu- 

•  '  *  Will  not  the  reader  be  furprlfcJ  to  hear  that  the  follow- 
ing toall  was  a  favourite  with  them  ?  "  May  national  grati- 
*•  tude  ever  diHinguifli  Americans."  This  is  a  pretty  clear 
proof.  I  think,  that  they  did  not  look  upon  themlclves  as 
Americans;  or,  at  leall,  that  in  tlieir  capacity  of  Demo- 
crats, they  looked  upon  themfelves  as  exempted  from  all 
diofe  moral  obligations  that  bind  the  reft  of  mankind. 


■\-.. 


(       >23       ) 


rally  Implies  the  mofl  mature  reflection,  and 
makes  an  aiFcrtion  or  an  opinion  in  print  be  juft- 
ly  regarded  as  irrciraclable.  For  this  reafon,  I 
iludl,  in  fupport  of  my  pofition,  brinj^  an  extract 
iVon\  a  print  whoTe  cliara«5ker  in  the  patriotic 
world,  yields  to  that  oFno  one. 

I  have  already  done  inylelf  the  honour  of  ex- 
tracling  a  fong  from  this  print,  after  which  its 
hatred  to  the  Government  of  Great  Britain  will 
not  be  difputed,  and,  I  think,  the  reader  will  - 
foon  to  be  eonvinced  that  its  hatred  to  that  of  the 
United  States  is  equally  fineere.  Indeed  the 
following  extradl  bears  in  itfelf  fuch  ample  con- 
firmation of  what  I  aflcrt,  that  it  needs  no  com- 
ment. 

"  There  is  a  fet  of  men  in  this  country  [Ame- 
*'  rica]  who,  to  palliate,  or  rather  deny  the  mal- 
*'  adminidration  of  Government,  charge  the 
dij contents  and  clamours  of  the  people  to  a 
reftlefs  temper,  or  the  afts  of  factious  and 
defigning  men.  \xi  order  to  illuflrate  this  af- 
fertion,  it  is  infifled  that  our  conJJiiution  is  a 
perfection  of  human  wifdom — it  is  admitted 
that  our  conftitution  is  excellent,  and  that 
compared  with  the  forms  of  government 
which  have  preceded  it,  we  really  difcover  a 
fuperiority,  that  occafions  a  furprlfe  that  the 
people  are  not  happy  and  contented.** 
"  Whatever  courtiers  may  plcafe  to  fay,  on 
my  part,  I  feel  no  incHnation  to  compliment 
men  in  power  at  the  expence  of  the  difpofitioii 

and  gooid  fenfe  of  my  fellow  citizens. 

To  charge  a  people  heretofore  diilingulflied 
for  their  prompt  and  due  fubmiflion  to  the 
Uws,    and  orderly  condud,  with    turbulence 


cc 

cc 
cc 

Ci 

cc 
«c 

cc 


.  } 


'<fi 


(     124     ) 

**  and  unjujl  dif content^  or  to  fuppofe  that,  the 
•'  good  fcnle  of  American  citizens  cannot  peiie- 
*'  trate  the  defigns  of  facftious  men,  are  aflcr- 
"  tions  fcarcely  meriting  (eri(nis  attention. 

*'  The  conititution  of  the  United  States  is  free 
"   and  excellent,  and  yet  the  people  are  not  hap- 
*'  py  and  contenteJ.      In  free  governments  when 
**  the  laws   are    well    adminiitcred,  the  national 
"  h(mour    regarded,    and  the    property   of   the 
**  citizens  prote<Sted,  fuhmillion  to  the  law,  and 
*'  conlicience  in   thofe  who  are  charged  with  the 
*'  adminifl ration,  will  confequently  follow.    But 
"  when  the  property  of  the  citizen  is  unproteft- 
"  ed,     nay,     even    his    facrcd    perfon    can    find 
*'  no  protedion  * — when  the  honour  of  the  nation 
'*  is  become  fo  pmjlitnted^  that  an   invafion   of 
"  territory  or    denial  of  jnft    right  is  fubmitted 
"  to  with   humility — when  the   national  honour 
"   cannot  be  aflerted,  becaufe  it  might  interfere 
"  with  i\.Q  vennl  projcSls  of  a  certain  junto — when 
*'  every  meafure  which  is  pretended   to  be  pur- 
*'  fued  for  the   public  welfare,  is  veiled  with   a 
"  myflerious  fecrecy  becoming  a  Turkijh  Divan^ 
"   and  when   men  are   appointed  to  procure  re- 
*'  drefs — in    whom    the   people  mod    interefted 
*'  ha'ue  no  confidence^  and  againft  whom  conftitu- 
'•'  tional  objections   are    juftly    fuggelled — what 
*'  are   we   to  exped  ^ — diigult ;     difconteRt  and 
"  total  want  of  couhdence  mufl  refult.**  - 

*  I  wonder  whether  this  furious  Democrat  would  have 
the  Congrcfs  go  in  perfon  and  tear  the  Dey  of  Algiers* 
eyes  out  ?  H(  w  could  they  help  the  peace  between  the 
Alkierines  and  Portuguefe,  any  more  than  they  can  help  it3 
thundering  or  raining  ?  I'll  venture  my  life  this  liberty  boy 
has  never  given  a  penny  towards  the  ranfoming  of  the  pri« 
foners  in  Algiers.  "       •  '    •  •?• 


(   «»s  ) 


*«  That  the   people   are   diiTatlsficd,    and   do 
**  complain   from   New   Hampihire  to   Georgia, 
*'  from  the   Ocean  to  the  MiHiflippi,  is  what  no 
*'  prollituted  fycophant  of  power  will  dare  de- 
«  ny — That  thofc  complaints  are  too  well  found-  . 
**  ed   is  our   misfortune — but  if  you  doubt,  aik 
*'  your   merchant  what  rcdrefs  he    has  received 
*'  for    his  property  robbed  and    plundered    upon 
*'  the  mod  iniamous  pretexts  ?  afk  your  mariner 
"  what  rcdrefs  he  has  received  for  the  lofs  of  bis 
*'  hard  earned  fcr'vices*  for  his  fulFering  by  pri- 
"  fon   fnips    and    empreflment  ? — afk  your    fel* 
*'  low    citizens  from  one  end  of  our  extenfive 
"  frontier  to  the  other,  what  they  fuffer  ?  On 
*'  the  one  hand  they  are  expofed  to   the  mur- 
*'  dering  hatchet  of  the  favage  Indians,  and  the 
*'  encroachments  of  the  more  favage  Briton. 
*'  On  the  other    a    natural    right  is    withheld, 
''  though  fccured    by  folemn   treaty»^-^^wt  under 
*'  all    thefe    difgraceful    and  diflrefling  circum- 
*'  fiances,  we  are  told  that  our  complaints,  are 
"  the    ebullitions  of    a    reftlefs    difpofr'on,    or 
*•  that  they  are  created  by  the  machinations  of 
''  a  fadion — for  we  have  a  moil  excellent  go- 
"  vernment,  and  virtuous,    and    great    men  to 
*'  adminilter  it. — That  the  government  is  good 
*'  we  believe — but  without   charging    any    par- 
"  ticular  branch  of  it,  we  fhall  not  hefitate  to 
"  pronounce  that  our  affairs  are  badly  conduft- 
*'  ed,  and  whether  from  the  errors  of  ignorance  or 
*'  the  defigns  of  wickednefs,  a  remedy,  fhould  be 
''  ipplied. — AndthankGodl  that  remedy, though 
*'  not  inuncdiately^  will  *ere  long  be  in  the  handi  of 

*  1  fuppofe  the  reader  knows,  that  Democrats  claim  as 
a  natural  privilege,  an  exemption  from  writing  and  fpeak- 
iiig  fenfe. 


i'" 


'r- 


'/• 


, »    ' 


(     >*<5    ) 


S 


« 


fC 


"  the  people* — then  it  is  to  be  hoped  that  the 
true  Republicans  of  America  will  unite,  and 
hurl  with  juft  refentment  from  their  exalted 
'^  ftations,  men  who  have  abufed  the  confidence 
"  of  a  generous  people. — To  effect  ibis — per- 
*'  fevere  ye  writers  in  defence  of  liberty — and 
"  you  popular  focieties^  relax  not  your  laudable 
"  purfuits^  your  countrymen  fhall  blefsyou,  and 
"  your   honeft    zeal  fliall  be  crowned   with  pa- 

"  triotic    rewards let    no    conliderations    of 

*'  paji  fer'vkes^  or  temporary  dignity,  deter  you 
"  from  exhibiting  to  public  view  the  public  fer- 
*'  varit  who  has  abufed  his  trujl^  or  acts  not  for 
'*  the  interefl  of  thofe  who  conflituted  him.. 
Difregard  the  infinuations  of  men  who  object 
tc  fuch  inftitutions — no  man  would  objett  to 
fuch  focietles,  but  one  ivho  ivijhes  to  reduce  you 
to  the  condition  of /laves,  to  deprive  you  of  the 
right  of  thinking  and  exercifmg  your  opi- 
nions upon  public  affairs,  or  one  whofe  con- 
dud  will  not  bear  the  teft  of  'avefligat'on." 
I  could  go  on  to  a  thoufand  pages  with  pieces 
of  this  calf,  that  have  appeared  within  the  lad 
nine  months ;  but,  i  dare  fay,  the  reader  will 
excufe  my  ftoj  ping  here^  This  piece  was  among 
the  fir  ft  I  came  at,  and  I  have  copied  it  word 
for  word  and  lett^ir  for  lettei ,  ^"ithout  even  the 
omidion  of  a  comma  or  a  dalh,.  Since  the  fail- 
ure of  a  certain  enterprife,  there  is  no  doubt 
that  the  Author  or  Authors  of  it  woidd  wifh  it 
turned  into  blank  paper  ;  br:t,  alas  !  the  wifh  is 
vain  ;  in  va^n  would  they  cry,  with  Lady  Mac- 


it 


*  Tl\is  prophecy  appeared  in  print  about  the  20th  of  Ju- 
ly laft,  jiiil  at  xh(t  time  when  the  Rebellion  in  the  Well  was 
breaking  out  j  its  date  explains  its  meaning. 


V 


■■"•v> 


(     127     ) 


'S 


le 
iil- 
Ibt 

it 


13    ^':;'- 


beth  ;  "  out,  damn'J  I'pot  V'  It  is  like thtir 

reputations.        -  •  "     '  *  '     • ' 

Thus  then  I  think,  nobody  will  deny,  that 
a  hatred  of  the  Briti/h  Government  and  of  that 
of  the  United  States  go  hand  in  hand.  Nor  is 
the  reafon  of  this  at  all  myflerious  ;  it  is  not 
becaufe  of  their  refemblance  to  each  other  in 
form,  nor  as  the  Democrats  have  ingeniouHy 
obferved,  becaufe  *'  there  is  fome  dangerous 
*'  connexion  between  Great  Britain  anc^  our 
*'  public  affairs ;  it  is  becaufe  they  are  both 
purfuing  the  fame  line  of  conducl  with  refped: 
to  clubs  and  confpirations  ;  it  is  becaufe  they 
have  both  the  fame  radical  defe£l,  a  power  to 
fupprefs  anarchy  ;  it  is,  to  fay  all  in  on  i  word, 
becaufe  they  are  governments.  Great  Britain  has 
a  government  of  fome  fort  (nobody  will  deny 
that  i  fuppofe),  and  this  is  fafficieiit  to  merit 
their  execration.  It  is  not  the  form  of  go- 
vernment, it  is  not  the  manner  of  its  admini- 
Oration ;  it  is  the  thing  itfelf,  they  are  at  war 
with,  and  that  they  mutl  be  eternally  at  war 
v/ith  ;  for,  government  implies  ordc/,  and  or- 
der and  anarchy  can  never  agree.  The  Car- 
magnole fyftem  (if  there  can  be  any  fyftem  in 
annihilation)  is  '  exactly  adapted  to  their  tafte 
and  interefl  ;  a  fyClem  that  has  made  "  rich 
"  men  look  fad,  and  ruffians  dance  and  fing." 
If  this  were  not  the  true  reafon  why  fuch  an 
eternal  larum  about  the  Britifh  Government  ? 
What  have  we  or  our  Democrats  to  do  with  it 
If  the  people  of  that  country  like  it,  why  need  it 
pefter  us  \  That  pious  and  patriotic  Scotchman, 
the  Author  of  the  Political  Progrefs^  teils  us  ''  to 
*'  wilh  that   an  earthquake  or  a    Volcano  may 


1 


JI^-2 ^ 


C     «28     ) 


iC 


<( 


c< 


cc 


-.  .*, 


bury  the   whole  Britlfli  Iflands  *  together  in 
the  centre  of  the  globe  ;     that  a   fingle,  but 
decifive  exertion  of  Almighty   Vengeance  may 
terminate  the  progrefs  f  and  the  remembrance 
of  their  crimes."     Yea,   be  it    even  as  thou 
fayefl:,   thou   mighty   Cyclop  ;  but  let    us   leave 
them  then    to  the  vengeance  of  the  Almighty  j 
let  us  not  ufurp  the  place-of  the  Thunderer.       < 
Underftand  me,  reader  ;  I  would  by  no  means 
infinuate,  that  a  man  cannot  be  a  firm  friend  of 
the   Federal  Government,    and  at  the  fame  time 
wifh    all  manner  of  fuccefs  to  the  French,     in 
their  prefent  ftruggle   for  what  their  vanity  and 
our  complaifance  have   ter  T='d  Liberty  ;    on  the 
contrary,  I  think  it  ver    ..    .u;al   for  an  Ameri- 
can, who  has  no  other  idea:  of  Liberty»than  that 
which  is  conveyed  to  him  by  his  fenfes  ;  who  is 
not  refined  enough   to    tafte  that    metaphyfical 
kind  of  Liberty,    that  can  exifl  only  in  a  brain 
afflicted  with  the  mania  reformatio  ;  who  in  fhort, 
has    no  notion  that    Liberty   confuts   in  yield- 
ing up  the   crop  he  has  laboured  all  the  year  to 
raife,  and  in   receiving  three  or  four  ounces  of 
black  bread  a  day  in  lieu    of  it  :     it  is  natural, 
and  even  laudable,  for  fuch  a  m?  '  i-i  be  zealous 
in  the  caufe  of  the  French,  who     ,     L'^   is   told, 
are  fighting  for   Liberty  ;    but   evt  \   i;e   ought 
to  keep  his   zeal  within  the  bounds  of  decency  : 
when  it  b/eaks  out  into  Civic-Feaits,    Cockades 


m 


'  ''^  ^  ■"  ."V''.-  -,^ 


*  And  the  Ifle  of  Sky,  that «  terrcftrlal  Pai'adife,"  among 
the  reft. 


•'-,«-'rf^-='     ,*%•:■ 


t  If  fomc  fuch  exertion  had   terminated  another  progrefs^ 
it  might  have   fpared   fomebod/  a    good  many  fits    of  the 


gripes. 


.-..I-    :i^•>■ 


•r-. 


the 


«J  /a  tricolor,  and  fuch  like  buffoonery,  it  expofes 
him  to  ridicule,  and  makes  him  one  of  the 
rabble.  "  Let  the  French  wear  their  gar- 
*'  lands  of  ftraw  ;  let  them  drefs  up  their  itrura- 
*'  pets  in  leaves  of  oak,  and  nickname  their  ca- 
"  lendar  ;  let  them  play  thofe  pranks  at  home, 
*'  and  we  fliall  be  but  merry  fpe^iators.'*  '  Thefe 
are  the  words  of  a  gentleman,  who  feems  to  have 
been,  on  this  occafion,  and,  indecfi,  on  mod 
pther  occafions,  rather  unfriendly  to  our  allies. 
I  am  for  carrying  our  complaifance  further  ;  I 
*am  for  not  only  letting  them  play  their  pranks  at  > 
home,  but  here  alfo,  if  they  pleafe.  If  there  be  ' 
fomething,  the  feeing  of  .which  may  turn  to  our 
amufement  or  profit,  I  fee  no  reafon  why  we 
iliould  Ihut  our  eyes  ?  Did  not  the  wife  Lacede- 
monians make  their  flaves  drunk,  and  turn  thehi 
ioofe,  once  a  year,  to  infpire  their  youth  with  a 
horror  for  that  beaftly  vice  ?  In  fliort,  I  am  for 
hearing  them,  looking  at  them,  laughing  at  them, 
or  any  thing  but  imitating  them.  Imitation  here 
is  ridiculous.  When  Shakefpeare  wrote  the  cha- 
tacler  of  Tin  lago  or  a  Caliban,  or  Molier,  that 
of  a  Tartuffe,  they  certainly  never  meant  to  ex- 
cite imitation.  Ihoufands  of  mob  crowd  to 
fee  one  of  their  friends  hanged^  but  not  one  of  '. 
them  ever  dreams  of  participating  in  the  cere- 
mony. > 

Talking  of  dreaming  puts  me  in  mind    of  a 
dream  i  had  iafl  fummer,  which  is  fo  apropos  to  v 
the  prefent  fubjeft,  and  contains  fo  many*  whim- 
fical  circumftances,    that  I  flatter  myfelf  it  will 
not  be  diiagreeable  to  the  reader. 

In  the  month  of  Au^ufl  laft  (I  believe,  it  was 
on  the  10//^  or  \ith  day),  I  retired  to  refl  abjut 

R 


\:  ;>L 


A  -  \ . 


(         130        ) 


eleven  o'clock  ;  but  the  heat  and  mufqultoes  to- 
Fether  prevented  me  from  falling  afieep,  'till  the 
watchman  had  been  round  for  three.  Soon  af- 
ter this  I  dropped  ofF  for  about  an  hour  and  a 
half,  during  which  time  my  fancy  fported  in  the 
following  dream. 

I  thought,  1  was  walking  up  Market  Street,  by 
the  fide  of  Old  William  Penn,  the  founder  of 
the  City  ;  who  told  me,  I  thought,  that  he 
was  come  upon  earth  again  to  fee  if  his  defceu- 
(lants,  and  thofe  of  his  companions,  continued 
to  walk  in  the  paths  of  peace  and  integrity.  I 
thought,  1  afked  him  with  a  kind  of  a  fneer,  whe- 
ther he  had  hot  found  things  furpafling  his  ex- 
pe(Station ;  upon  which  tHe  old  man,  after  a 
heavy  figh,  told  me  a  long  deal  about  freeing 
Blacks  vyith  one  hand,  and  buying  Whites  with 
the  other,  about  godly  malice  and  maple-fugar, 
and  about  thofe  "  precious  hypocrites"  (thefe 
were  his  very  words)  BriiTot  and  WarnerMifflin* 
&;c.  &c.  &c.  to  the  end  of  the  chapter.  .  ^ 


-V 


V        *   To  j.uft{fy  this   title   of  **  precious  hypocrites,*^   I  fhafl 
liere  give  an   extraft  from   Briflbt's  TraveU,  Letter  IX.    V 


(C 


(( 


(( 


<( 


*( 


I  knew  (fays  Friend  Warner  to  Friend  Briflbt)  I 
*'  knew,  friend,  that  thou  waft  here,  and  I  am<:ome  to  fee 
thee.  Bcfides  I  /ove  thy  nation.  1  was,  1  confel's, 
much  prejudiced  againft  the  French  ;  I  even  hated  them, 
having  in  this  refped,  been  mifled  by  an  Engl'Jh  educa- 
tion. But,  when  1  faw  them,  a  fecret  voice  faid  to  me 
**  that  I  ought  to  knoiv  them  and  love  them.  I  have  inoiou 
**  them,  and  have  found  them  to  poffefs  a  fpirit  of  mildnefs 
**  and  lentvolence  that  I  never  found  among  the  Engltjhy 

"  This  made"  fays  Friend  Briffot,  "  a  deep  impreffioii 
**  on  my  heart.  What  humanity  !  what  charity  !  what  love 
**  of  mankind  !" 

Yes,  this  m.ade  fo  ftrong  an  impreffion  on  Friend  Briflbt*a 
heart,  that  the  villain  went  home  and  fet  to  murdering  with 
the  utmoil  diligence.     This  very   Briffot  was  the  leading 


fhaa 


I : 


)  I 

o  fee 

fefs, 
nem, 

uca- 
me 
noion 
Idneff 

^flioii 
love 


flbt'a 
with 
iding 


/ 


•s? 


»    ' 


C  131   ) 


>,. 


'  y 


•  Before  the  good  old  man  had  finifhed  his  fto- 
ry,  which,  by  the  by,  was  a  pretty  tough  one,  we 
were,  1  thought,  got  to  the  upper  end  of  Market- 
Street,  where  we  were  (topped  by  a  monltrous 
crowd  of  people,  that  not  only  blocked  up  the 
way,  but  filled  all  the  fields  for  a  great  way  out. 
I  thought,  however,  that  we  wedged  along  a- 
mong  the  crowd  for  a  good  while,  'till  at  lafl: 
we  could  penetrate  no  further.  Our  ears  were 
aflfailed  from  all  quarters  with  the  firing  of  can- 
non, founding  of  trumpets,  beating  of  drums, 
ringing  of  bells,  finging,  hooping,  hallowing 
and  blafpheming,  as  if  hell  itfelf  had  been  broke 
loofe.  Yet,  the  crowd  feenied  not  to  exprefs  the 
lead  fear  :  joy  feemed  feated  on  every  counte- 
nance, and  expectation  in  every  eye.  We  had 
not  waited  long  in  this  fituatidn,  when  two  ban- 
ners, at  fome  little  diftance,  announced  the  ap- 
proach of  a  proceflion,  at  once  the  mod  ludi- 
crous  and  mod  idolatrous  that  ever  eyes  beheld. 

I  thought,  there  was  a  fort  of  pyramid,  made  of 

■ ,  •.'  >     > ...  ,-  . .  ■', 

accufer  of  the  king  for  the  confpiracy  of  the  loth  of  Auguft, 
and  he  himfclf  alt(  rwards  boaftf  d  to  have  organized  the  con- 
fpiracy, in  concert  vpith  Louvet,  &c.  "  What  humanity  i 
*'  what  charity  !" 
.  As  to  Friend  Warner,  the  Englifh  learnt  him  to  hate  the 
French,  though  they  could  not  learn  him  to  pull  off"  his  hat, 
**  What  humanity  !  what  charity  !" — A  fecret  voice  told 
him  that  he  ought  to  knoiv  them  and  to  lo've  them,  and  he 
h^%  known  and  loved  them,  and  found  them  to  poffefs  a  fpirit 
of  mUilnefs,  &c.  Warner,  feems  to  have  forgotten  their 
fcalping  knives  ;  but  let  him  notv  tell  us  whether  they  are 
mild  or  n»t.  If  I  knenv  this  Warner,  I  would  make  him  a 
prefentof  a  *'  Bloody  Buoy,^'  which  I  think  v/ould  convince 
him,  that,  in  fpite  of  all  his  cant,  the  Englifh  ftill  pofTefs  a 
little  rnore  nnldnefs  than  his  new  Friends. 

1  beg.  to  be  understood  here,  as  throwing  no  flur  on  the 
feft  to  which  Warner  belongs,  and  for  which  I  have  as  much 
refped  as  mofl.  perfons. 


1,. 


./5- 


'.  r 


V  -" 


(^132    ) 


•■v-.. 


paper,  with  a  red  night  cap  upon  the  tnp  of  it, 
and  carried  by  two  Americans  and  two  Foreign- 
ers, ail  of  whom,  like  the  pyramid,  were  drefied 
in  red  night  caps.  Round  the  pyramid  marched 
I  thought  a  bevy  of  virgins  in  white  robes,  each 
wearing  a  crown  and  celtus  tricolour,  and  bearing 
a  garland  in  her  hand  ;  and  (what  fluff  do  we 
dream  of!)  I  thought  thefe  nymphs  were  uOiered 
by  nine  or  ten  pr;eits*,  whofe  only  mark  of  dif- 
tinQlon  was  a  nojc^ay  of^  raw  tied  round  with  a 
ribbon.  1  thought  that  behind  thcfe,  came  a 
company  of  artillery  with  their  cannon,  and  that 
they  were  followed  by  a  gang  of  mufic.  Then,  T. 
thought  followed  the  two  banners  above  menti- 
oned ;  one  of  them  having  for  arms  the  imperial 
Eagle,  jufl"  as  it  is  feen  on  the  ftandards  of  the 
Holy  Roman  Empire  ;  the  other  was  fo  black  and 
-^irty  that  I  could  not  diftinguilh  its  armory  ;  it 
*eemed,  I  thought,  rather  the  enfign  of  the  infer- 
nal regions  than  of  any  earthly  nation.  "  After 
*' this  I  beheld,  and,  lo,  a  great  multitude  that 
•'  no  man  could  number,  of  all  nations,  and 
*'  kindreds,  and  people,  and  tongues,'*  and  cO" 
lours*  I  thou;i,ht  however  I  could  diftinguifh  a- 
mongfl  them  (but  it  is  all  a  dream)  the  Chiefs  of 
the  State  of  Pennfylvania  !  ! 

I  thought,  we  follov/ed  this  antick  fliow  into 
a  fpacious  enclofure,  where,  on  an  altar,  not  of 
burnifhed  gold,  but  of  deal  boards,  flood  The 
GodJefs,  the  objed  of  the  feafl.  She  was  dreffed 
like  the  Cyprian  Queen,  when  fhe  received  the 
prize  from  the  Idalian  Shepherd  j  that  is  to  fay, 
— in  her  (kin  :  in  her  right  hand  ihe  held  a 
ftaff  mounted  with  a  night-cap,  and  in  her  left^ 
a  dagger  ;  on  her  head  fhe  had  a  cap,  decora-.. 
ted,  in   appearance,  with   lillies  ;  but,    upon  a 


k ' 


^ 
v 


^  ' 


?■."  / 


.V  , 


If, 


1/ 


*r 


'  >\*. 


«. 


'%ii' 


-    ..  -.    (  '33  )  ■■  •..;>'; 

clofer  examination,  I   thought,    I    found   them 
to  be  real  bells.      This  difcovery  led  me  to  per- 
ceive, that  I  had  committed   an    error   with    re-  • 
fped  to  the  identity  of  her  perfon  ;   for  hear- 
ing that  her  worfliippers  were  called  cus-nus,  *  I 
had   concluded   fhe  was    the    Goddefs    Gloacinay 
and  in  this  opinion  1  was  in  fome  meafure  con- 
firmed by  feeing;  her  worfhipped  with  nofe-gays  of  x 
Jiraw  ;   but   the   Cap  and   Bells  fet   me  right  at  ^ 
once  ;  in  fhort,  I  faw  plainly  it  was  the  Goddefs 
of  Foil f ;    which,  I   thought,    was  befides  fully 
proved   by    the  behaviour  of  the   crowd.     But  ' 
ilill,  the  dagger  remained  unexplained  ;  for,  we 
all   know,  that  that   weapon   is  not  among  the 
infignia  of  this   Goddels.     In    this  perplexity  I 
happened  to  caft  my  eyes  downward,  and,  on  the 
front  of  the  altar,  I  thought  I  faw  the  following   , 
phrafe  from  Voltaire  :  "  Sous  ma  tulelle,  lesfmges 
*'  agacent  les  Tigres."       ■.^.■V:      '  , i 

The  Priefts,  I  thought,  were  ranged  round  ; 
the  altar,  offering  up  their  nofe-gays,  and  invok- 
ing the  afliftance  of  the  Qoddefs,  while  the 
air  rang  with  Hallelujahs.  The  invocation  was  * 
no  fooner  ended  and  the  benediction  given  by 
the  High  Prieft,  than  the  whole  (^not  excepting 
the  Chiefs^  I  thoug'.t,  of  the  State  of  FennfyU 
vania  )  began  dancing  and  capering  a  la  camii- 
bale  round  the  altar,  at  the  fame  time  deafening 
the  very  firmament  with  their  cries. 

Here  my   venerable    companion,    who,    had 
been  very  uneafy  during  the  whole  fcene,  would 
abfolutely    flop    no    longer ;    and    to  confefs  a    : 
truth,  i  began    to  feel  a  good  deal  uneafy  my- J, 
felf.     I    thought,  we   got  with    fome    difficulty 
to  the  out-fide,  and  feeing  a  young  fellow  of  a 


^■'< 


.vt.'  '.:'<'. 


)'   ,■' 


This  /in  the  vulgar  tongue,  means,  bare— —A -es. 


».-v 


■/' 


II 

n 


'  /  •"(   134  ) 


«c 


C£ 


« 


(C 


milder  afpe£i:  than  the  reft,  the  Old  Man  ven- 
tured to  aflc  him,  how  long  thofe  people  had  been 
Pagans^  1  thought,  the  fellow  gave  him  a  look 
of  infinite  contempt,  and  anfwered  :  "  I  fee  you 
are  a  fuperftitious  old  fool,  that  knows  no- 
thing of  the  luminous  clofe  of  the  Eighteenth 
Century.  Why,  you  (lupid  old  dog,  we  are 
"  all  Chriflians  yet :  what  you  have  feen  to-day 
is  only  a  jubilee,  to  celebrate  the  down-fall  of 
our  bejl  friend^  and  the  maffacre  of  nine  hundred 
of  our  neighbours  by  the  hands  of  forty  tbou- 
fand  of  their  countrymen." — 
As  he  fpoke  thefe  laft  words,  I  thought  his 
perfon,  which  was  that  of  a  genteel  and  gentle 
American,  alfumed  the  hideous  form  of  the  ter- 
rific Medufa  ;  his  fingers  were  transformed  into 
the  claws  of  a  Tyger,  the  fangs  of  a  Boar  hung 
down  his  foaming  jaws,  his  eyes  became  a  gla- 
ring ball,  and  his  hair  a  bed  of  Snakes,  curling 
round  his  fcuU  and  hiding  de(trud:ion.  The 
poor  Old  Man,  though  immortal,  was  appalled, 
and  ruflied  into  the  grave  to  hide  himfelf  from 
the  petrifying  fight.  I  uttered  a  fliriek,  and  a- 
waked  ;  but,  awaking  was  very  far  from  putting 
an  end  to  my  fright :  itill  the  noife  continued, 
and  ftiil  was  I  {tilTened  with  horror  ;  unable  to 
determine  whether  it  was  a  dream  or  not.  My 
voice,  however,  had  alarmed  the  family,  and 
Oh !  how  glad  was  I  to  find,  that  the  noife  I 
heard,  was  nothing  but  that  of  the  French  and 
our  own  citizens,  aflembled  to  celebrate  the  *'  Holy 
*'  Infurreftion''  of  the  23d  Thermidor,  10th  o£ 
Augujt,  Old  Style.*  ■- 

*  To  thofe  who  h've  at  fome  dillance  from  Philadelphia, 
it  may  be  neccffary  to  fay,  that  this,  is  a  correA  defcription 
of  the  Civic  Feajl  that  was  held  there  on  the  loth  of  Aujj, 
1794. 


r. 


y 

d 


.^!. 


Ah  !  Mr.  Author  of  The  Political  Progrffs  ; 
you  think  I  have  forgotten  you,  do  you  ?  You 
will  find  prefently  that  I  have  not  :  but  I  muft 
have  time  for  flceping,  you  know,  whether  I  • 
dream  or  not.  I  did  not,  like  you,  bring  my 
pamphlet,  reacjy  fabricated,  from  Scotland  ; 
and,  befides,  1  have  better  company  than  you, 
at  prefent,  you  will  therefore  pleafe  to  excufe  me 
for  a  quarter  of  an  hour  longer. 

In  France,  and,    1  believe,    it\  mofl:  of  the  o- 
ther  countries  of  Europe,     when  a   Mountebank 
Do£lor,  a  puppet  man,  or  any  other  of  the  iti- 
nerant tribe,  enters,  a  town^  he  goes  round  with 
a   trumpet  to  announce  his    arrival.      Tantarra 
foon  brings  a  troop  of  blackguard  boys   round 
him,  and,    thus  attended,    he  flruts  about  the. 
ftreets,  flopping  from  time  to  time  to  advertife 
the  people  of  the  unheard-of  feats  tha.t  are  juft 
going   to  be   performed,   and  concluding  every 
harrangue    with,    "  hollow,  you  dogs,  holloiu  V* 
tipon  this  follows  a  noife,    compared  to   which, 
the  War  Hoop  of  the  Indians,  or  even  a  debate  , 
in  the  National   Convention,    is  melody.      jBut, ' 
deteflable  as  it  is,    it  anfwers  the  purpofe    of  the 
Operator  ;     for    though   fober  fenfible    people  v. 
fhun  him,  and  all  that    belongs  to  him,   as  they 
would  the  Itch  or  the  Halter,  he  gc  lerally  find«  \ 
dupes  in  too  great  abundance. 
.     How  often  has  this/owrof  European  charla^ 
ianerie  been  played  off  upon  us,  fmce  the  month 
of  March,    1793.     Since  that  time  more  money 
has  been  fpent  in  drinking  "  deftrudlion  to  the 
"  combined  defpots,"  and  liberty  to   the  French, 
than  would  have  ranfomed  our  unfortunate,  and 
. I  am  afraid  forgotten,  brethren,  who  are  groan- 
ing in  chains  in  Algiers!    Merciful    Heaven  I 
'  thaiheareft  the  moans  of  the  Captive,  and    fcefl 


f ' 


\' 


•(   135  ) 


t^e  hearts  of  all  men,  is  this  humanity!**  Is 
this  "  patriotifm  ?  If  any  thing  could  add  to 
the  humiliation  of  having  been  the  Zany  of  a 
charlatan,  it  would  certainiy  be  this. 

Among  the  many  (hining  talents  of  our  Demo- 
crats, there  is  none  for  which  they  arc  more  juftly 
deferving  admiration,  than  their  adroitncfs  in 
tran'^ferring  their  attachment  from  one  object  to 
another.  It  is  beyond  the  power  of  figures  or 
words  to  exprefs  the  hugs  and  kifl'es  tbAt  were  la- 
vifhed  on  Citizen  Genet.  The  poor  citizen  had 
like  to  have  fhared  the  fate  of  the  image  of  Abel 
on  the  church  of  our  Lady  of  Loretto,  which, 
■we  are  told,  is  almoft  worn  away  by  the  ar- 
dent kifles  of  the  Pilgrims  :  for  our  filgrims 
who  went  to  meet  the  Citizen,  were  by  no 
means  lefs  eager  to  give  this  mark  of  their  af- 
fection to  the  darling  of  therreat  Alma  Mater 
of  Anarchy.  Such  was  their  eagernefs  to  ob- 
tain precedence  on  this  joyful  occafion,  that  ve-" 
ry  few  parts,  if  any,  of  the  Citizen's  body, 
cfcaped  a  falute  ;  and  before  he  arrived  fafe  at 
the  "  Capitol"  of  fome  places,  he  was  licked  as 
clean  as  a  bear  at  three  hours  after  being  whelped. 

For  a  long  time  La  Fayette  "WSls  their  god  ;  -)■  but 
it  was  found  juli:  and  fit  to  exchange  him  for  the 
*'  virtuous  Egalite."  Egalite  was  fupplanted 
by  Danton ;  "  the  great  and  dreadful  Danton 
^'  who   comes    thundering   on   the    Ariftocrats, 


\ 


«■> 


■\  Paine  dedicated  his  fecond  part  of  The  r'lghs  of  Man  to 
La  Fayette  J  and,  in  lefs  than  a  year  afterwards,  aflifted 
in  pafllng  an  afl  of  condemnation  againft  him ;  and  a- 
nother  56I  by  which  his  innocent  wife  and  children  were 
left  without  bread  to  eat!  Poor  La  Fayette  !  to  make  ufe 
of  a  parody  on  your  own  words,  "  M?y  your  fate  fcrve  as 
a  Icffon  to  demagogues,  and  as  aa  example  to  govem- 
mcnta.'* 


(   ,. 


19 


at 


(     ^Z7    )  . 

1  •  « 

"  like  Neptune  from  Olympus.***  But  the  O- 
lympian  thunder  of  this  Neptune  was  obliged 
to  jijive  place  to  the  "  morals  and  religion  of  Ro- 
I'e/picrre."  After  his  pious  report  on  the  l'ubje«^ 
of  religion,  which  the  Unitarian  Do6lor  (Priefl- 
ley)  read  "  with  pleafure,  and  even  enthufi- 
"  afin,"  it  is  thought,  that  our  Democrats  re- 
ally began  to  believe  there  was  a  God  ;  and  there 
is  no  telling  what  a  favourable  change  of  conduft 
this  might  have  produced  if  the  news  of  the 
unfortunate  cataftrophe  of  the  i8ih  of  July  had 
not  come  to  fet  their  affe^lion  afloat  again.  Alas  ! 
it  is  now  wandering  on  the  fca  of  uncertainty  ; 
nor  can  we  ever  expe<fl:  to  fee  it  cafl  anchor,  *till 
we  know  who  has  the  fecure  poflTeiiion  of  the 
Guillotine. 

Yet  (for,  though  I  hate  the  very  name  of  De- 
mocrat, I  would  fcorn  to  detract  from  their  me- 
rit) there  is  one  charader  to  whom  they  have 
ever  conferved  an  unfhaken  attachment.  How 
grateful  mufl  it  be  to  thee,  injured  ihade  of  the 
gentle  Marat !  whether  thou  wandered  on  the 
flowery  banks  of  the  Stygian  Pool,  or  bathell 
thy  pure  limbs  in  the  delightful  liquid  of  Tarta- 
rus, or  walkefl  hand  in  hand  with  Jefus  Chri/l 
in  that  Literary  Elyfium,  the  Philadelphia  Ga- 
zette\ — hc-w  grateful  mud  it  be  to  thee,  though 
thou  makell  Hell  more  hideous  and  frightened 
the  very  furies  into  fits,  to  be  yet  adored  by  the 
Democrats  of  the  city  of  brotherly  love,    . 


'  .»! 


^'V. 


I 


1 


ife 


*  See  the  General  Advertifer,  • 


'  f  In  this  print,  for'  the  month  of  July  laR  is  a  lift  of  Dc- 
.•     mocrats,  the  great  henefadors  of  manh'ind ;  among  them  are 
Marat  and  Jefus  Chr'i/l. 


r 


'  •  ■> , 


C  'js   ) 

The  American  Union  prefcnts,  at  this  mo- 
ment, a  fpcdcicle  thar  llartlos  the  eye  of  reafon. 
We  fee  a  kind  of  political  land-mark,  on  one 
fide  of  which.  Order  wii'ks  hand  in  hand  with 
the  mofl  perfe<^t  Liberty  ;  and,  on  tfie  other, 
Anarchy  revels,  furrounded  wiih  its  den  of  flaves. 
We  fee,  that  thole  who  are  mo(t  accuftonied  to 
the  exercife  of  tyranny,  are  the  firlt  to  oppofc 
every  meafure  for  the  curbing  of  licentioufnefs  ; 
or,  in  other  words,  we  fee,  that  anarchy  and  def- 
jotifm  are  the  fame. 

If  there  could  be  found  a  perfon  in  this  coun- 
try who  has  a  doubt  of  this,  I  think,  the  follow- 
ing authentic  pieces  would  operate  his  conviction. 
We  ought  not  to  fpeak  ill  of  our  neighbours, 
but  if  people  will  [peak  ill  of  themfeKes,  be- 
lieving then\  ought  no  ♦o  be  termed  malice. 
liCt  us  hear  then  whi  jr  Democrats  fay  of 
themfelves  -^  ^ 


I  hope,  reader,  you  are  fcnfible  of  the  benefits  ye/ut  Chriji 
has  conforrtd  on  the  wovld  ;  but  perhaps  you  may  not 
know  v'hat  has  entitled  Marat  to  ;n  equahty  with  him. 
Know  then,  that  Murnt  was  tht  principal  author  of  the 
majfacres  of  the  2d  and  3d  Si.pten.Uer,  1792,  in  which 
upwards  of  two  thcu'aud  live  hundred  innocent  perfons 
■were  inhumanly  butchcrid  ;  and  that,  after  this,  he  open- 
ly declared,  \\\  the  Natior.al  Convention,  and  publifhed  re- 
peatedly, that  another  two  hundred  and  fifty  thoufand  heads 
were  necefTary  to  the  tlUiblifhrnent  of  the  Liberty  of  the 
French.  , 

DvBtjr  Moore  (who  was  far  from  being  an  enemy  to  revo- 
lutionary piiuciphs)  fpeaks  of  Mat  at  in  the  following  terms. 
"  Marat  is  a  litt'e  niar>  of  a  cadaverous  complexion,  and 
"  a  countenance  exceedingl;,-  cxpreflive  of  his  difpofition  ; 
'*  to  a  painter  of  nK-ifacres,  Marat's  head  would  be  inetiima- 
**  ble."  In  another  pla'-e,  he  fays  :  "  This  Marat  is  faid 
**  to  love  carnage  like  a  vulture,  and  to  delight  in  human 
"  facrifices  like  Moloch,  God  of  the  Ammonites."  Here, 
reader,  you  fee  the  man  that  the  Philadelphia  Gat-ttte  (whofe 
end  is  the  "  public  good")  puts  upon  a  level  with  the 
Mli^g'td  Jefus  !  ! 


/' 


•rf 


o- 

-: 

^i 

■,\ 

18.  ' 

ad 

•^■'  ■  . 

*:> 

'  ; 

.'.'       .    ■ 

■:'•  ''^  ■ 

a- 

id 

"  •■ '   "  »■. ' 

an 

'» -  ,•■' . 

-•    •» 

^ 

1„' 

e. /i 

■  \'  •  , ; 

fe  :. . 

:-rA':y 

\c 

■'*" 

(    '39    )        .:  0    . 

Tonjfs  drunk  on  the  6th  of   February,   1794,  ^y 
French  and  American  Citizens, 

"    I.     The    Demncratic   Societies  throughout 

"  the  world uiay  they  ever  be  the  watchful 

*'  guardians  of  Liberty. 

"  2.  Citizen  Madifon  and  the  Republican  par- 
"  Z;'  in  Congrefs. 

"  3.    The  firm  patriot,    and   true  Republican^ 

"   Citi/    1  Genet.* a  falutc  from  the  French 

«*   Sloop  of  War. 

'«  4.  1  he  Guillotine  to  all  Tyrants,  Plunder- 
*'  ers,  ^nd  funding  Speculators. 

"  5.  May  the  flags  of  France  and  America 
!'  ever  be  united  againfl  regal  tyranny. 

*'  6.  The  6th  of  February,  lyyS^theday  which 
"  fecured  liberty  to  America^  \  and  fowed  its  feeds 
"  in  the  foil  of  France. 

"  7.  Gratitude.  The  firft  of  National  as  well  as 
"  individual  virtues. { 

*'  8.  May  laws  and  not  proclamations ^%  be  the 
*•  mftruments  by  which  free  men  fhall  be  regula- 
ted. 

9.  The  perfecuted  Citizen  Genet  ;  may  his 
country  reward  his  honell  zeal,  and  the  iliafts 


(C 


cc 


cc 


'  *  This  was  candid  indeed.  The  Democrats  might  have 
left  us  to  believe,  that  the  "  republican  party*  in  Congrefa 
meant  the  real  friends  of  this  country  ;  but  ihey  have  taken 
care  to  avoid  leading  us  into  this  error,  by  calling  Citizen 
Genet  a  true  republican. 

\  Here  they  confefs  then  that  the  treaty  with  Louis  XVI. 
fecured  liberty  to  jinierica. 

:,,    X  Do  you  doubt  of  their  gratitude  ?  Hear  them  fing, 
•  **   Fame  let  thy  trumpet  found,  .  ;;  ' 

**  Tell  ail  the  world  arpuiid 
,;•  "How  Capet  fell  ;   &c. 

§  The  reader  hardly  wants  to  be  told,  that  the  Prefident'* 
Proclamation  of  Neutrality  is  meant  here. 


•'«.'■ 


-■V.' 


I 


( 


I40 


) 


r  ■; 


i^-r 


'^  o[  cot'imny  levelled  againfl  him,  recoil  upon  the 
"  Archers.*^  - . 

*'  ID.  May  all  men  who  afpire  io  the  ftiprcme 
*'  piiiver^  be  brought  below  the  level  of  their  fel- 
*'  low  citizens.  ,     ,..^.',   .,    i 

"  li.  The  courageous  and  Virtuous  mouHiain, 
"  may  it  crufh  the  moderates,  the  traitors,  the 
*•  federalijfs^  and  all  AriRocrats,  under  ivhatevcr 
"  deno?n'uiati9n  they  may  be  li'guifed. 

"  12.  Succefs  to  the  brave  Republicans  of 
*'  LouiJJatia.j-  -.. 

*'  1.3.  Dertrudion  to  the  enemies  of  the  French 
*'   Republic,  both  by  Sea  and  Land. 

"  14.  Henry  Grattan,  and  the  Opoofition  of 
'*  Ireland. 

"  15.  Citizens  Fox  and  Stanhope,  and  the 
Oppolition  in  Engk.nd. 

"  16.  Liberty,  Eouality,  and  Fraternity — may 
"  they  pervade  the  Univerfr,  Three  cheers,  and 
"  a  lalute  of  three  guns." 

To  thele  extra £i:s  i  (lull  take  the  liberty  of  add- 
ing two  others  ;  both  from  the  famel  ewfpaper  ; 
one  of  rhem  is  an  elegant  account  of  the  clofe 
of  a  Civic-feaft,  and  the  other,  though  not  abfo- 
Ijtely  on  the  fame  fubjed  as  the  firft,  certainly 
i.dds  to  its  ^"eauty.  The  firft  is  the  precious  jew- 
el, and  the  lafl:  the  foil ;  I  ihall  therefore  place 
them  as  near  as  poffible  to  each  other. 


^?''' 


*  The  Pre fident  of  the  United  v?tates  was  the,  Archer  that 
brought  the  Citizen  from  his  lofty  perch. 

Reader,  is  it  not  rather  furprifing  that  Thomas  Mifflin,  Go- 
vernor of  the  iUte  of  Pernfylvania,  Ihould  afliil  at  the  drink- 
ing of  thefe  two  toafts  ?  /    " 

-|-  Thcfe  Republicans  were  a  gang  of  brigands,  committing 
robberies  in  the  Spanifti  tyrritories,  and  who  were  profcribed 
by  prodaiiiation.     .   .^        .-,..■ 


( 


141     ; 


ri 


0.' 


■'  i-» 


"  lor  Sale, 


«'  After  this  the  Cap 
«•  of  Liberty  was  pla- 
"  ced  on  the  head  of 
"  the  Prefident,  then 
"  on  each  Member. 
'*'  The  marfellois  hymn 
"  and  other  fmilar 
"  fongs  were  friig  by 
*'  different  French  citi- 
*'  zen  members.  Thus 
''•  cheerfully  glided  the 
"  hours  away  of  this 
"  feaft,  made  by  con- 
"  genial  fouls  to  com- 
*'  memorate  the  happy 
*'  day,  when  the  fons 
"  of  Frenchmen  joined 
"  the  fons  of  America 
"  to  overthrow  tyran- 
"  ny  in  this  happy 
«  land."    J^  , -v 

Leaving  this  without  commciit,  I  fhall  add  an 
extract  or  two  from  a  debate  of  congrefs,  which 
I  fhall  alio  leave  without  comment :  fuch  things 
ficorn  the  aid  of  declamation.  :  >:f?.^ 

The  fubjedt  of  the  debate  I  allude  to  was,  an 
amendment  to  a  bill  of  Naturalization.  A  mem- 
ber ifoai  Virginia  had  prcpofed,  that  a  claufe 
fhould  be  inferted  to  exclude  foreign  noblemen 
from  becoming  citizens  of  the  United  States  of 
America,  unlefs  they  would  firft  make  a  folemn 
renunciation  of  ibeir  Titles*  A  member  from 
New  England  propofcd,  as  an  amendment  to  this, 
that  fuch  noblemen  Ihould  alfo  renounce  the 
right  of  holding JJ lives.  On  this  amendment  a 
member   from  Carolina  faid  ;    ^^  That  the  gen- 


*'  Two    neiiro    lads 

o 

"  one  about  twelve 
"  and  the  other  abcut 
"  fifteen  years  old 
'•  — both  remarkably 
healthy  ; — the  youn- 
'  gcft  is  near  four  feet 
"  nine  inches  high, 
"  and  the  oldeil;  above 

"  five    feet. Alfo 

"  a  negro  wench  for 
"  fale,  coming  eigh- 
"  teen  years  old,  and 
"  far    adv.mced     with 

"  child but     very 

"  ftrong  and  capable 
"  of  any  kind  of 
"  work."  !!!!     -  v 


:/.,/<■ 


!<!(. 


m 


:i  i 


. 


^* 


X''i42     ) 


I  . 


.rr 


d 


■  .  ''  >■ 


''  tleman  <3^wry?  »o/  come  forward,  and  tell  th^ 
*'  houfe,  that  men  v/ho  poffcJ/eJ  JJaves  were  un- 
"  fit  for  holding  an  office  under  a  Republican 
*'  government. — He  defired  the  gentleman  to 
*'  confidcr  what  might  be  the  cunfequence  of 
*'  this  motion,  at  this  lime,  confidering  what 
''  has  happened  in  the  Wefl  Indies* — Flis  a- 
"  mendment  would  irritate  the  minds  of  thou- 
*'  fands  of  good  citizens  in  the  fouibern  States, 
"  as  it  effects  the  property  which  they  have  ac- 
"  quired  by-  their  tnJiiJiry. — He  thought  that 
"  the  amendment  partook  more  of  monarchical 
*'  principles  than  any  thing  which  he  had  feen 
*'  for  fome  rime.''* 
' .  .  A  member  from  Virginia  faid  on  the  fame  oc- 
cafion,  that  "  He  held  property  facred^  and  ne- 
,  *'  ver  could  conlent  to  prohibit  the  emigrant 
,  *'  nohiliiy  from  having  Jlaves  any  more  than  o- 
*'  ther  p.^iple.  But  as  for  titles  of  nobility  they 
'^  wcr'2  qtate  a  different  ihing.'*f  -  ■    , 

*  Tt  is  not  amifs  to  hear  Repuhluans  declare,  that  monar^ 
ehical  principles  tend  to  dfcountenance  Slavery.  A  doftrine 
like  this  would  furprifc  the  partizans  of  citizens  Stanhope  and 
Fox. 

■     '  .  ...  .  '^^^ 

f  This  gentleman's   motion  againfl:    titled  foreigners    haff 

excited  fome  cu.iollty,  and  ftill  appears  inexph'cable  to  ma- 
ny, feeing  that  it  was  totally  unneccfTary  :  but  if  we  refledl, 
v/e  Oiall  find  it  is  no  more  than  natural.      It  is  in    the  heart  of 

)  man,  reader,  you  muft  fearch  for  an  explication  of  motions 
like  this.  When  you  go  to  take  an  airing  in  a  chair,  do  you  not 
find,  that  every  Drayman  and  Clodpole,  you  meet  or  overtake, 

,  thwarts  you  in  your  road  as  much  as  he  can  ?  Does  he  not 
force  creatures  much  more  humane  and  polite  than  himielf, 
to  ftifle  you  with  duil  or  cover  you  with  mire  ?  It  is  not  a 
luxury  to  him,  if  he  can  overfet  your  carriage  and  .break 
your  limbs  ?  You  flare  and  wonder  what  ywi  have  done  to 
the  malicious  Boor.  Alas  !  you  have  done  nothing  to  him  j 
all  your  fault  is,  having  a  chair  while  he  has  nons. 


Ii 


.tf.-* 


i 


I- 


/* 


e 


Oh  !  happy  Carolina  !  happy,  thrice  happy 
Virginia  !  No  tyrannical  Ariftocrat  dares  to  lord 
it  over  the  free  born  fwains  who  cultivate  the 
delicious  weed,  that  adorns,  fiiit  thy  lovely  fields 
and  then  the  lovelier  chops  of  the  driveling  drunk- 
ard !  After  having  fpent  the  day  in  finging 
hymns  to  the  goddei^  of  Liberty,  the  virtuous 
Democrat  gets  him  home  to  his  peaceful  dwel- 
ling, and  lleeps,  with  his  property  fecure  beneath  , 
his  roof,  yea,  fometimes  in  his  very  arms  ;  and 
when  his  "  indu/iry**  has  enhanced  its  value,  it;.> 
bears  to  a  new  owner  the  proofs  of  his  Demo- 
cratic Delicacy  !  r 

What  a  difference  between  thefe  happy  States,  : 
and  thole  vile  ariftocratical  ones  in  Europe  I  ; 
There,  as  the  poets  fays. 


tt 


-a few  agree 


*'  To  call  it  freedom,  when  / hem/elves  zrt  free  j 

**   A  land  of  tyrants  and  a  den  of  Slaves, 

**  Where  wretchi.;.  lind  difhonourable  graves." 


n 


-'* 


This  I  muft  confefs  is  a  gloomy   fub]e<5t,  a^fft 
therefore  we  wiil,  if  vou    pleafe,    reader,  return,, 
once  again  to  the  Poi  tical   Progrefs  of  Britain  5 
for  change,    they  fay,    even    of    calamities,     is 
cheerful. 

though  the  enc   iragers  of  this  work    might 
think  it  a  means  of  deceiving  the  ignorant,  and  \ 
adding  to    the   prejudic      againlt    Great  Britain,  ^ 
yet  they  fee m  to  ha       had  another  view,  which 
perhaps  the  cudden  of  an  author   knew    nothing 
of.     The  Political  Progrefs  profefles  to  fhow  "  the 
ruinous^  confeqvences  of  taxation,**      And,  indeed,  , 
this  is    the  burden  of  the  fong  ;    almolt    every 
paragraph  clofes  with  melancholy   reflexions  on 
the  confequences  of /^x<<//o«.     The    author  even 
goes^  fo  far,  in   one  place,  as  to  declare,     that 


In 


si  :,- 


r-  ■ 


1  .:'> 


(         144        ) 


Ci 


ihejl'tghtcjl  and  moft  necejjar^  iaxes^  are  very  de- 
"  flrudive."  This  it  was  that  recommended  the 
piece  to  the  gentlemen    who    eticouragediht  au- 

^    thor  topublifliit  in  America:  it  was  fo  apropos 
too;    fojud  the  very  thing. 

With  refpeft  to  the  expediency  of  taxation  in 
general,  it  is  not  to  my  prefent  purpofe  to 
fay  any  thing*  about  it  ;  every  one  that  is  not 
already  upon  four  legs,  knc  ws  that  he  foon  mud 
be  fo  without  fomething  of  this  kind  ;  |  what 
I  wifh  to  dired  the  reader's  attention  to,  is,  ^ 
the  real  obiecl  of  the  publication  in  queftion. 
If  then  he  will  take  the  trouble  to  compare  the  . 
above  doftrine  on  taxation,  with  that  held  forth 
by  the  "  Weltern  Brethren,"  and  their  relations 
in  every  quarter  of  the  Union ;  and  if  he  will 
pleafe  to  take  notice  of  the  time  when  the  PoU- 
ileal  Progrcfs^  was  preparing  for  prefs  (the  month 
of  Augult  lafl)  he  will  I  fancy  be  of  opinion, 
wit!*  me  that  the  encourage rs  had  the  United 
States  in  their  eye,  much  more  than  Great  Bri- 
tain. As  if  they  had  faid  :  look  here^  Americans^ fee 
wb2t  taxation  has  done  in  another  country  ;  and,  if  \ 
you  do  not  put  a  Jiop  to  it,  if  you  not  refij}  it  with 
all  your  mighty  it  will  certainly  do  the  fame  in  your 
own.  The  national  debt,  taxes,  &c.  of  Great 
Britain  were  well  adapted  to  their  purpofe  ;  they 
knew,  by  themfelves,  that  the  bulk  of  readers  ' 
were  incapable  of  going  into  calculations  of  this 
kind;    of  making  jufl  comparilbns   between  this   . 

/  country  and  that  :  is  was  like  reading  the  hillory 

'^  of  a  giant  to  a  pigmy. 

'  Nobody  t,.n  doubt,  particularly  if   country  be 

"   taken  into  the   confideration,    that  the  grinders 


.N    .•■'<. 


f  May  n(,L  this  be  the  reafon  why  our  Domocrats  are  con- 
timially  crying  out  againft  taxes  ?  I  rnuil  confefs,  I  think 
they  would  not  look  amifs  upon   all  fours. 


.%  r^ 


'A 


(     M5    )    .         '    . 

and  retailers  of  Mundungus  were  among  the 
author's  enconragers,  I  remember  hearing  a 
fpeaker  of  this  honourable  body,  holding  a 
talk  to  his  brothers,  in  the  Month  of  May  laft, 
from  the  window  of  a  certain  State  Houfe.  I 
fhall  not  eafily  forget  his  faying,  among  many 
other  things  equally  modeft  and  unaflfuming, 
that  he  had  told  the  Secretary  of  the  Treafury, 
that  if  the  Mundungus  was  taxed,  "  he  would 
"  be  damn*d  if  ever  he  forgave  him^  while  he  had 
"  an  exiftence."  His  fpeech,  though  from  the 
fample  here  given,  it  may  be  fuppofed  to  furpafs 
in  ribaldry  thofe  of  Tom  the  1  inker  or  even  Tom 
the  Devil,  had  an  amazing  effed  upon  the  loons 
below,  who  were  all  watching  with  their  jaws 
diftended  to  catch,  not  the  oracular,  but  the  an- 
archical belches.  When  the  refolve  was  put, 
it  would  have  done  your  heart  good  to  fee  and 
hear,  What  a  forefl:  of  ruity  hats  and  dirty 
paws  were  poked  up  into  the  air  in  token  of  ap- 
probation oi  ^^  no  excife  P*        '" 

**  Jack  Straw  at  London — Stone  with  all  his  rout,  .r      ; 
'-         •*  Struck  not  the  City  with  fo  loud  a  fliout.**      ^xm^''^y^.! 

But    this  had  no  eiTedl  j  and  now  they  run 
about,   (tunning  us 

fc ""  ,  '■,  ■. 

■  -,  --  -^'-.^    . 

,     ,       *'  With  many  a  deadly  grunt  and  doleful  fqueak,        Lv-J 
*'  Poor  fwitie,  as  if  their  pretty  hearts  would  break." 

It  is  certainly  worthy  of  remark,  that,  among 

'  the  fpeechifiers  at  this  talk,  there  was  but  one 

American,    and  that,    among  the  hollow  boys, 

perhaps   there  were  not  twenty.     How  kind  is 

/this    of  foreigners,  to  come  and  put   us  in  the 

right  road,  when  we  are  going  wrong  !       -_  , 


>.,  J 


1-'  • 


■•/:, 


/ ,       ■>. 


Wi 


[If  ■ 


(     "46     ) 


n 

-"■'■■ 

n 

•  *  ■  .             ^ 

1 

1 

s 

Ccmpp.re  the  principles  of  the  fiipportcrs  of 
this  talk,  and  thofc  of  their  **  Wcftcin  Breth- 
Icn/'  with  the  piinciples  inculcated  in  The'  Pa- 
litical  Prcgrefs  of  Britain,  and  fee  if  they  do  not 
cxadH)  tally  ;  if  they  do  not  all  point  to  the  fame 
objed  ;  that  is  to  fay,  to  the  undermining  of 
•t*ll  government,  and  to  the  dcflrudion  of  the 
iocial  fyiltin.  Is  it  not  fair  then  to  conclude 
that  The  Political  Progrcfs  was  employed  as  an 
auxiliary  in  this  laudable  enterprize  ? 

If  this  was  not  its  objed,  '.vhat  was  its  objc£l  ^- 
I  would  ad;  the  lovers  of  their  country,  if  fuch 
there  are  among  the  encouragcrs  of  this  author, 
what  good  they  could  intend  to  render  it  by  fuch 
a  ftep  ?  I  think  they  would  be  puzzled  for  an 
anfwer.  Did  they  imagine,  could  they  imagine, 
that  his  having  narrowly  efcaped  tranfportation 
in  his  own  country,  was  a  fufficient  fecurity  for 
his  being  a  mcfl  excellent  citizen  in  this  ?  Be- 
caufc  his  book  had  been  burnt  bv  the  hands  of 
the  common  hangman  in  Scotland,  did  they  ima- 
gine chat  it  was  calculated  for  the  edification  of  the 
people  of  the  United  States  ?  That  the  author 
believed  this  to  be  the  cafe  is  clear,  otherwife  he 
uould  not  have  introduced  himfelf  by  expofing 
that,  which  he  certainly  would  have  kept  out 
of  fight,  if  he  nad  been  appealing  to  virtue  or 
reaCou,  indead  of  prejudice.  .     -^ 

To  what  a  pitch  mull  this  unmeaning,  this 
fruitlefs  ill-nature  againft  a  foreign  country  be 
carried,  if  to  be  declared  infamous  there,  is  be- 
come a  recommendation  here  !  If  a  fellow,  to 
uHier  himfelf  into  favour,  mufl:  cry  out:  I  have 
had  a  narrcw  efcape  !  Lobk  ye^  good  folks  ^  here's 
the  murk  of  the  halter  about  my  neck  yet  !  If  this 
be  the  cafe,  we.  rnay  as  well  adopt  at  once  that 
fiimous  decree  of  the  Jacobin   Club  at  Paris, 


s 


■■\, 


'  \ 


**•. 


(      147     ) 


of. 

ih- 

me 
of 
he 
idc 
an    > 

\  ^- 
ch 

Dr,   > 
ich 
an 

on 
"or 
k- 
of 
a- 
le 

or  . 
le 

<r    • 
t) 

Lit 


)e 

^_. 

o 

!e 
s 

3 

it 


which  requires  as  an  eflential  quahfication  in 
each  member,  that  he  fliall,  previous  to  his  ad- 
'mitrion,  have  coniinitteil  fome  crime  worthy  of 
the  gibbet  !  A  regiMuti on  like  this  was  very 
proper,     and    even    neccHfary    in  a    de^nocratic 

,  club,  and  for  that  very   reafon,  unn"^cefraTy  and 
improper  every  where  elfe. 

Tbe  Political  Progrefs  is  in  politics,  what  mad 
'i'om  's  Age  of  Reafon  is  in  rch'^-ion,  and  they  have 

.  both  m^t  with  encouragement  from  i'orne  people 
here,  from  nearly  the  fame  motive.  Had  not 
the  lafl  mentioned  piece  been  fupprefied  in  En- 
.  .  gland,  there  is  every  reafon  to  believe,  that  it 
would  never  have  rivalled  the  Bible  among  us,  in 
fo  many  families  as  it  does.  What  a  prepoflerous 
thing  1  People,  who  deteft  blafphemous  publica- 
tions, will  tolerate,  will  read  them,  and  put 
them  into  the  hands  of  their  children,  becaufe 
other  people  have  declared  them  blafphemous  I 
Pope  !  would  have  faid  ; 

**  Thus  Infidels  the  true  Believers  quit,  -    ; 

"  And  are  but  damn'd  for  havini-  too  much  wit." 

o 

To  what  deception,  to  what  infulting  quacke- 
ry of  all  forts  has  not  this  prejudice  cxpofed  us  ! 
A  projector  (and,  I  think,  like  the  Author  of  the 
Political  Progrefs^  of  the  Caledonian  race)  propo- 
fed,  fome  time  ago,  to  change  the  language  of  the 
country.  He  even  went  fo  far  as  to  have  his 
fcherae  and  propofals  printed.  A?  to  the  fcheme 
itfelf,  it  confided  in  the  introduction  of  feveral 
new  characters  into  the  Alphabet,  and  in  chang- 
ing the  (hape  or  manner  of  writing,  of  fome  of 
the  old  ones.  To  give  the  reader  as  good  an 
idea,  as  he  can  poffibly  have,  of  the  merits  of 
,  this  fcheme,  it  will  be  fufHcient  to  tell  him,   that 


'A  ,• 


.:^r.^,'/.--h. 


"\  ■•, 


>  •    i .  n  ' 


/> 


.:;t  I 


fill' 


■■■-i: 


/  v/       (     H8     ) 

the  /  was    to  be  turned   upfide   down,   and  the 
point  was  placed  under   the  line   thus ;.     Ridicu- 
lous as  this  may  feem,  and  much  as  the    Author 
may,  in  fome   people's  opinion,  appear  to  merit 
a  cap  and  bells,   yet  we  muft   lupjpofe,  he  knew 
whom  he  was  making  the  propolal    to.     There 
is  hardly    any   thing  too  grofs   for  an    appetite 
whetted  by  revenge.     The  preface  to  this  greafy 
dab  was  a  (harpening  fauce,  well   calculated  to 
make  it  go  down.     It  was  printed  in  the  "  Ama- 
rpan   LanSuaSa**    (I  go  as  far  as  *'  barbarian" 
types  will  permit   me)   ;    but,  for  the  benefit  of 
the  unlearned,  the  Author  had  the  complaifance 
to  give  a  tranflation  of  it  on  the  oppofite  page. 
This  preface  fet  forth,  as  near  as  I  can  recollect, 
that,  the  United  States  of  America  having,  by 
a  moft  fuccefsful  and  glorious  war,  fhaken   off 
the  difgraceful    yoke  of    Britifli  Bondage,  they 
ought  to  endeavour  by  every  poflible  means  to 
obliterate  the  memory  of  having  ever  borne  it  ; 
and,  that  nothing  could  be  more  conducive  to 
the  attainment  of  this  defirable  object  than  the 
difufe  of  a  ^^r^^rowj  language,  impofed  on  them 

by  tyrants,  and  fit  only  for  flaves,.  &c.  &c. 

^  I  would  advife  the  Author  never  to  read  this  pre- 
face in  the  ftable  j  the  horfes  would  certainly  kick 
his  brains  out. 

Some  readers,  may  imagine,  perhaps,  that 
this  is  all  a  joke  ;  but  I  certainly  faw  the  thing, 
as  I  have  defcribed  it,  and  in  the  hands  of  feve- 
ral  perfons  too.  It  was  in  the  month  of  Oftober 
1793,  that  I  faw  it  ;  it  was  in  a  fmall  o6lavo 
volume,  printed  at  Philadelphia,  and  the  Au- 
thor's name,  ?f  I  am  not  miftaken,  Thornton. 

After  this,  who  would  wonder  if  fome  one 
were   to  tell  us,  that  it  is  beneath  Republicuns 


M   ■   ' 


>»» 


)  . 


(  149         ) 

to  eat,   and  th-^t  wc  ought  to  eflablifii  a  fydem  of 
French  ftarvation,  only  bccaule   the  Engiifli  live 

by  eating  ?  '  .  ,x. '  -  J,  .^  :;:  •  .  u 
•  There  is  nothing  that  might  not  be  received 
Without  furprife  atur  tlie  projed  of  this  Linguilt, 
and  therefore  we  may  remember  with  lels  ailon- 
ifliment  the  notable  projeft  of  that  Democrat 
Brilfot,  tor  curing  the  confumption.     He    tells    us, 

,  I  that  our   women  are  more  fubjc£l  to  the  con- 

Ifumption  than  men,  "  becaufe  they  want  (as 
"  they  do  in  England)  a  ivill  or  a  civil  exijlcnct  : 
*'  the  fubmiflion  which  women  are  habituated 
"  to,  caufes  obfir unions  !  deadens  the  vital 
*'  principle  and  impedes  circulation.'*  As  a  re- 
.medy  for  this,     he  produces  us,  quack  like,  his 

%  infallible  noftrum,  Liberty  ^md  Equality!  Graci- 
-ous  Heavens  !  Liberty  and   Equahty  to  cure  the 

>  confumption  !      .    :^,.;  vi;4i- :    t 

V.  •.  Yes  let  him  perfuade  us.  if  he  can,  that  our 
wives  and  daughters  die  of  the  confumption, 
becaufe  they  do  not,  like  his  execrable  patriotic 
concitoyemies^  change  gallants  as  often  as  they  do 
their  cbemifes.     If  he  could  even  convince  us  of 

,.  the  efficacy  of  his    remedy,  we  fliould  certainly 

■7;  reje6l   it,     as  ten  thoufand  million  times  worfc 

V.  than  the  difeafe.     And  you,  ye  Fair  Americans, 

are  you  aihamed  to  follow  the  bright  example  of 

•;  your  Mothers  ?  Would  you  accept  of  Mr.  Brif- 
■.-^  ibt's  nodrum  ?  No  ;   you  are  too  mild,  too -love- 
ly, to  become  the  tribune  of  a  Democratic  Club  : 

'  your  lilly  hands  were  never  made  to  wield  a 
,;  dagger,  you  want  no  rights,  no  power  but 
. .  what  you  poflefs  :  your  empire  is   much  better 

.  guarded  by  a  bofom  of  fnow,  than  it   would  be 


t  Sec  the  28th  letter  of  his  Travels  In  America. 


•?'-;/M 


■v  -••  >. 


.4 

I:' 


Hi:' 

i'tV: 


^;/X 


by  the   nifty  battered  bread    plates,     worn  by 
thole  terrible  termigants,  the  *'  heroin^,   of  Pa- 


(( 


ris. 


When  I  faid  that  w:  fhould  certainly  reje6l 
Mr.  .Briri'ot*s  remedy,  I  by  no  means  meant  to 
include  thcmc:nbers  of  Democratic  Societies  and 
others  of  that  (ta!np  :  becaufe  they  are  fo  diame- 
trically oppofite  in  their  taftes,  to  the  rcit  of 
mankind,  that  1  quelUon  much  whether  they  do 
not  look  upon  a  pair  of  antlers  as  an  honoura- 
ble mark  of  diflinriion.  Nor  is  It  impofTible 
that  many  of  theui  may  really  be  decorated  to 
their  heart's  content  ;  for,  certain  it  is  that  the 
ladies  do  not  bear  them  a  very  great  affeelion. 
They  imagine,  and  with  reafon,  that  the  Demo- 
crats, in  their  rage  for  equality,  may,  one  of 
thffe  days,  attempt  to  reduce  them  to  a  level 
with  their  fable  "  property.**  Befides,  if  they 
ftood  ever  fo  fair  In  the  opinion  of  the  ladies, 
mull  not  their  gander-frolicks,  and  their  fqucez- 
ing,  and  hugging,  and  kiffing  one  another,  be 
cxpefted  to  caufe  a  good  deal  of  pouting  and 
jealoufy  ?  And  then,  at  the  back  of  all  this, 
comes  there  intriguing  with  that  cutlandifh  God- 
defs  of  Liberty  !  this  alone  muft  inevitably  wean 
them  from  their  lawful  connexions  :  for,  it-  is 
moially  Impofllble,  that  one,  who  is  admitted 
to  clandefline  familiarities  with  a  Deity,  fhould 
not  difdain  a  poor  thing  in  petticoats.  La  Fon- 
taine'has  a  verfe  which-fays  that  a  man  can  ne- 
ver bend  his  knees  too  often  before  his  God  and 
his  Miftrefs  ;  but  our  democrats  have  laia  afide 
both  God  and  Miflrefs,  and  have  taken  up  With 
with  a  ftrumpet  of  a  Goddefs,  who  receives  the 
homage  due  to  both. 

Being  upon    this  fubje£t,    It  is  hardly  fair  to 
omit  mentioning  a  great  and  mighty    democrat. 


■\ 


.^^^'- 


I  by 
Pa- 

;je6l 

t  to 

ani 

inc- 

t  of 

r  do 

jra- 

'ib!c 

to 

the^^ 

on. 

no- 

of 

:vel 

icy 

cs, 

:z- 

be  ^ 

us  . 'r;. 

Id  '  ' 

d 


■\ 


r>-^ 


""Vp 


C    «i'    ) 


-U>'L 


who  is  imiverfally  allowed  to  be  a  pcrfccl  piaio- " 
jiift  both  ill    politics  and  love,  and   yet   has  the 
xinconfcionablc  ambition  to  fct  up  for  a    man  of 
^cHantry.     He  has  taken  it  into  his  head  to   run 
dangling  from  one   Boarding  School  to   another, 
in  order  to  acquire  by  the  art  of  fpcechifying, 
a  reputation  fur  which  nature  fceins  to  have  dif- 
qualified   him.     My  imagination  cannot  form  to 
itfelf  any    thing   more    perfedly  comic    than    to 
fee  a  diminutive  fupcrannuated  bachelor,   cocked 
up  upon  a  ftool,   and   {pouting  out    compliments 
to  an  afibmbly  of  young  mifies.     Ah  !  dear  Plato  ! 
take  my  word  lor  it,  if  your  repuiation  had  been 
no  higher  among  the  tlemocrats  than  among  the 
ladies,  your  name  would  never  have  found  a  place 
on  their  lid.     "  Phillis  the  fair,  in  the  bloom  of 
fifteen,'*    feels    no    more  emotion  at    your    fine 
fpeeche.i,  than  flie  would   at   the  quavers  of  an 
Italian  Singer  :  for,  though  they  are  both  equally 
foft  and  fmooth,  there  is  a  certain  concatenation 
of  ideas  (do  you  underfland  me  ^  )   that  whifpers 
her  heart,  all  you  have  faid,  and  all  you  can  fay, 
is   lot    worth   one  broken     figh  fron\  lilooming 
twenty-two.     Hear    what    a    brother    democrat 

%s  :  *  ;•■■"■   "    .  ■■•-  .,.  ,.' 


*;  A 


v.w». . 


*'  Tut-il  forti  de  I'Empire,  c^t-i'l  fcrvi  Ls  DIlux, 
*'  Fut-il  nc  du  Trident,  11  Languit  s'il  tit  vicux  ! 


This  is  a  forrowful  truth  ;  but,  take  heart,  ci- 
tizen :  all  men  are  not  made  for  all  things ,  if  a 
man  does  not  know  hew  to  play  at  cards,  it  ib  kind 
of  him  to  hold  the  candle  ;  he  that  has  no  teeth, 
cannot  crack  nuts  ;  but  that  does  not  liinder  him 
from  preparing  them  for  thofe  who  can. 

*  The  Abbe  de  LiHc,  a  renegade  from  the  Frencli  clerpfy. 
This  beautiful  climax  fell  from  his  pen,  before  he  difi^ractii 
himfeif. 


* 


!S 


j;     .    I      * 


.:    (  »5*  ) 

Now,  reader,  fufFcr  mc  to  rrtiirn,  for  the  lafl 
time,  to  7 be  Volitical  Progrcfs  of  Britahi  ;  though 
I  niuft  confefs  it  has  :\t\v{\  only  the  part  of  an 
ufhcr,  it  oup;ht  certainly  to  appear  at  the  break- 
ing up  of  the  ball.  •    . 

The  Political  Pro^rcfs  contains  among  many 
ether  reh'gioully  patriotic  thinj^s  ton  numerous 
to  mention,  a  prophecy^ — not  of  the  dcltruiSli- 
on  of  the  Whore  of  Babylon  aiul  the  *'  perfonal 
reign,  of  Jcfus  over  the  Unitarians.*'!  but  of 
the  deftrufiion  of  tlie  empire  of  Great-Britain  ! 
This  is  certainly  a  mod  defrible  event,  and  fo 
abfokitely  neceilary  to  our  happinefs,  that  every 
thing  which  has  been  faid  on  the  fubjedl,  merits 
our  attention.  The  Unitarian  Dodor  tells  us, 
and  in  a  fermon  too,  that  his  country  muft  foon 
undergo  a  "  purification,"  or,  as  he  calls  it 
in  another  place,  "  the  definition  of  them  that 
have  deftroyed  the  earth.'*  '1  ^is  opinion  is  a 
good  deal  (trengthened  by  a  volume  of  dreams 
and  predi^ions,  publiflied  at  Philadelphia  by  a 
bookfcller  from  North  Britain,  and  the  whole 
appears  to  be  fully  confirmed  by  this  plain  un- 
qualified prophecy  of  the  author  of  7 /je  Politi- 
cal Progrcfs.  A  Revolution  will  take  place  in 
Scotland,  before  the  lapfe  of  Un  years  at  far- 
thdt." 

If  we  want  to  know  what  fort  of  Revolution  is 
here  meant,  we  have  only  to  look  at  the  toafls 
drunk  by  the  rcpuhlicn?i  Britons  at  New-York: 
— "  A  revolution  in  Great  Britain  and  Ireland, 
**  upon  fans  culotte principles — three  cheers."— — 
But  the  long  term  of  ten  ycars^  mentioned  in 
the  Prophecy  of  the  Author  of  the  Political  Pro- 
gfcfs,  has  given  a  good  deal  of  uneafinefs  to  fome 

\  See  Pricftlcy's  Sermons. 


'         V 


..  "1 


•     ■■       ••     c  .53  )       • 

of  his  zealous  friends  in  this  country.  Ten 
years!  'tis  an  eternity  1  they  thought  the  Woe- 
Trumpet  had  already  founded,  and  that  the 
kingdom  of  PrielUey's  fans  culotte  Heaven  was 
at  hand.  As  a  proof  that  I  do  not  advance  this 
upon  flight  furmife,  I  beg  leave  to  remind  the 
reader  of  what  was  faid  on  the  fubjed,  in  Con- 
grefs,  the  other  day,  by  that  *'  true  republi- 
"  can  Citizen  Maddifon.***  "  If  a  Revolution," 
faid  he,  "  was  to  take  place  in  Britain,  which 
"  for  my  part  I  expedt  and  believe  will  be  the 
*'  cafe,  the  Peerage  of  that  country  will  be 
"  thronging  to  the  United  States.  I  fliall  be 
"  ready  to  receive  them  with  all  that  hofpitality, 
"  refpedt  and  icndernefs  to  which  misfortune  is 
*'  entitled.  I  fliall  fynipathize  with  them,  and 
"  be  as  ready  to  aiford  them  whatever  friendly 
"  offices  lie  in  my  power  as  any  ma.k.  '  'Tis 
a  pity  the  poor  devils  are  not  apprifed  of  all  this. 
It  would  certainly  be  an  a6t  of  humanity  in  our 
good  Citizen  to  let  them  know  what  blefllngs  he 
has  in  Jlore  for  them  ;  they  feem  attached  to 
their  Coronets  and  Coach-and-fixes  at  prefent  ; 
but  were  they  informed  that  they  can  have  as 
much   homony  and  fat  pork  as  they  can  gobble 


*  This  18  the  fame  citizen  who  amiifed  the  Legiflature  lall 
year  with  a  ftring  of  Refolutions,  as  long  as  my  arm,  about 
commercial  rellriftions  with  refpeft  to  Great  Britain.  They 
are  now,  and  were  then,  called  by  way  of  excellence  : 
**  Maddifon'a  Refolutions;*'  but,  though  they  caught  like 
touchwood,  touchwood  like,  they  lay  fmouldering  upon  the 
table  for  nearly  two  months,  without  ever  producing  ei- 
ther light  or  heat.  All  the  good  they  did,  was  to  coll  the 
Union  about  20  or  30  thoufand  dollars  in  debates.  O  !  rare 
Patriotifm  ! 

u 


—  ■I'll'. 


(     M4    )  ,  . 

own  (once  every  day  of  their  lives,)  liberty  to 
chew  tobacco  and  fmoke  all  the  week,  and  to 
ride  out  on  the  meeting-going  mare  on  Sundays, 
it  might  tempt  them  to  quit  their  baubles  and 
their  poor  bit  of  an  Ifland  without  a  Aruggle,  and 
Vy  to  the  free  State  of  Virginia.  ..« 

And  do  you  really  imagine,  Sir,  that  you 
will  fee  the  Peerage  of  Great  Britain  come 
thronging  round  your  habitation  ?  Do  you  really 
promiie  youtfelf  the  extatic  delight  of  feeing 
them  (land  in  nen^d  of  your  "  fympathy,  tender- 
*'  nefs,  hofpitality  and  good  offices  '*"  It  is  well 
enough  for  Dreamers  and  Fortune-tellers,  for 
a  baffled  Unitarian  from  Birmingham,  or  a  fe- 
cond-fighted  Mumper  from  the  Ifle  of  Skye,  to 
entertain  us  with  fuch  vifions ;  but  for  you.  Sir, 
whom  the  populace  caHs  *'  a  damn'd  Clever 
"  Fellow,"  to  become  their  dupe,  is  fomething 
amazing.  If  I  am  not  miftaken,  you  obferved 
the  other  day,  that  it  was  improper  for  Congrefg 
to  meddle  with  the  affairs  of  the  Democratic 
Societies :  and,  is  it  not  full  as  improper  for  one 
of  its  members  to  turn  Soothfayer  concerning 
the  affairs  of  other  nations  ?  And  as  for  Syfnpa- 
t/jy  and  iendernefs^  Sir ;  thefe  things,  though  a- 
miable  in  themfelves,  may  fometimes  appear 
ungraceful.  Certain  Legiflators  have  very  \i^ife- 
ly  obferved,  that  liberty  is  not  a  bird  of  every 
climate  ;  nor  is  iendernefs  Sir :  and  though  I  do 
not  abfolutely  aver,  that  a  Jamaica  Slave-Dealer 
cannot  poffefs  one  grain  of  humanity,  yet,  1  con- 
fefs,  if  he  were  to  talk  to  me  of  his  iendernefs^  I 
Hiould  hardly  forbear  laughing. 

Laying  afide  dreaming  and  foothfaying, 
what  indications  do  we  perceive  of  an  approach- 
ing diffolutlon    of  the   empire  of  Britain?  Has 


"J 


■   '^. 


(     ^55    )  •     ' 

-   •>* 

fhe  loft  an  inch  of  territory,  or  has  her  enemy 
fet  a  foot  on  any  of  her  extenfive  dominions  fince 
the  beginning  of  the  war  ?  Ii>  fhe  not  in  polief-.  , 
fion  of  almott  the  whole  Weftern  Archipe-  .- 
lago  ?  Are  not  her  poflellions  incre^ifed  to  an 
amazing  extent  in  the  Eaft-Indies  ?  Has  flie  not 
more  men  and  more  cannon  afloat  than  the 
whole  worlJ.  befides ;  and  is  (he  not  the  undif- 
puted  Miftrefs  of  the  Ocean  ?  For  my  parr, 
the  En^lirti  are  no  favourites  of  mine  ;  1  care 
very  little  if  their  Jfland  were  fwallowed  up  by 
an  Earthquake ;  as  the  Author  of  the  pQlitical 
Ptogrefs  lays  j  but  truth  is  truth,  and  let  the  De- 
vil deny,  if  he  can,  that  this  is  the  truth. 

Arc  thefe  indications  of  weaknefs  and  diftrefs  ? 
Are  thefe  indications  of  approaching  diflblution  ? 

We  are  told,  the  other  day,  by  a  newfmon- 
ger  whom  1  have  already  mentioned  too  often, 
that  "  a  verbal  account,  of  the  greateft  authen- 
"  ticity,  had  confirmed  the  taking  of  Amfterdam, 
"  by  the  French ;  and  that,  as  foon  as  the  offi- 
*'  f/«/  account  came,  the  Editor  would  not  fail 
"  to  fing  forth,  in  the  loudeft  notes,  this  Iq/i 
*•*•  Jlroke  to  the  power  of  Britain*'  Of  Britain  !  1 
of  the  Dutch,  he  means ;  of  our  poor  old  friends 
the  Dutch !  And  what  have  they  done  to  us  ? 
The  truth  is,  1  believe,  that  the  Englifh  would 
join  us  in  rejoicing  at  fuch  an  event  as  this  ; 
that  is  to  fay  when  they  have  given  the  Hollan- 
ders time  to  carry  all  their  treasures  over  lo  Lon- 
don. We  pretend  to  laugh  at  John  Bull  j  but 
1  fancy,  that  John  is  at  this  moment  laughing 
in  his  (leeve  at  all  the  world.  The  Baboon  has 
been  tearing  himfelf  to  pieces  'till  he  is  no  more 
a  dangerous  neighbour  to  John;  and  if  he  fhould 
now,  in  his  mad  pranks,  give  Nic  Frog  a  fnap 


m\ 


•t  I.''! 


A 


(  '«56     ) 


or  even  fwallow  him  up  (as  he  is  very  fond  of 
fuch  diet),  it  will  only  turn  another  grifl  to  John's 
mill :  John,  if  1  know  any  thing  of  his  temper, 
wants  no  rival  of  any  fort. 

Again,  our  Demagogues  attempt  to  make  our 
hair  (land  on  end  with  the  Subficiies,  the  Englifti 
are  paying  to    foreign  princes  ;    and   have    the 
ingenuity  to  draw  an  argument  of  their  poverty 
from   a  circumftance,    which  above   all    others, 
proves    their  riches,    credit,    and    confequence. 
What  does  our  experience  fay  ?  If  we  go  upon 
change,  we  fee  people  buying  bills    upon  Lon- 
don at  three  or  four  per  cent  above  par ;  but  if 
a  fellow  were  to  take  it  into  his  head  to  propofe 
the  negociation  of  a  bill  on  Paris,  I  much  quelli- 
on  if  he  would  not  get  kicked  out  into  the  Itreet. 
There  is  no  friendlhip  in  trade.     The  exchange 
is  no  place  for  fraternizing.     If  I  recolle£i:  right, 
the  Secretary  of  State,  in  his  report  on  the  de- 
predations  on    the    commerce,    &c.     complains 
that  the  French  Convention  had  paid  for  certain 
cargoes  of  provifions  in  Affignats.     In  Afl'ignats ! 

. '  Morbleu  !  what  would   you  have  ?  Are  we  not 

told,  by  every  looby  of  a  Captain  that  arrives, 

that  Afiignats  are  at  par?  And,  what  is  more, 

'  has  not  the  Convention  ordered  them  to  be  at 

par^  on  pain  of  the  Guillotine?  We  have  not, 

4  I    think,  heard   any  complaints   againft  Englifh 
Bank  Notes:  and  yet,  we  know  the  Englifh  to 

.   be  upon  the   point    of  breaking.     What  fort  of 

^'  work  is  all  this  ? 

But  we  are  told  that  there  mujl  be  a  Revoluti- 

^'  on  in    England  ;    for,    that    the   people  are  all 

;:  ripe  for  revolt.     Where   is  the  proof  of    this  ? 

'   Not  in  the  conduct  of  their  land  or  fea  forces. 

*  At  the  beginning  of  the   war,   the  Convention 


:¥■ 


'^^•-■: 


/" .  1 


/. . , 


'  \     •    :  C    ^57    )       '•"     '  ''  ••. 

.  ■    ■    ■  ,  •.' 

decreed,  that  the  crew,  of  every  veflel  captured  ^. 
trom  the  EngHlh,  Ihould  fhare  in  the  prize. 
What  good  did  this  bafe  fatanic  democratic  de- 
cree produce  I  What  good  did  the  fraternizing 
fpeech  of  the  Carmagnole  Admiral  do  ?  I  do  not 
believe  he  even  found  time  to  pronounce  it. 
How  did  the  crew  of  the  Ship  Grange  behave  to 
Citizen  Bompard,  when  he  told  them  they  were  , 
to  fliare  in  the  prize,  and  that  they  were  not  his 
prifoners,  but  his   brothers  ?  "  No/*  faid   they, 

"  you  French  B r,  we  are  none  of  your 

"  brothers."  Alas !  I  fee  nothing  here  that  af- 
fords the   leaft  glimps  of  hope. But  the 

people  are  difcontented,  and  complain  of  their 

taxes : where  ?  in  England  ?  or  here  ? 

But  they  have  infurreftions  every  year  : and 

every  day  too,  if  we  believe  our  Newfpapers  ; 
it  appears  however,  that  there  has  been  only  one 
in  England,  of  late  years  ;  and  that  was/or  the 
government,  inftead  of  againll  it.  A  troop 
of  horfe  put  an  end  to  that  infurredion  ;  while 
fifteen  thoufand  men  were  obliged  to  march  to 
put  an  end  to  ours.  But  they  have  a  dozen 
prifoners  going  to  be  tried    for  High  Treafon  : 

and  have  not  we  more  than  two  dozen, 

going  to  be  tried  for  the  fame  offence  ? — O  !  but 
they   have    their   Carmagnole    Clubs,  and  their 

Stanhopes,  and  Foxes,    and  Sheridans  : yes, 

and,  God   confound  them  !  So   have  we  to  our 

forrow  ;   and  have  them  we  fhall,  'till  we  take 

the   fame  method  with    them    that  the   Englifh 

have  been  taking  with  theirs,  for  fome  time  paft. 

:j  Suppofe  Bradford,   the  Wat  Tyler  of  the  Weft, 

■^-  were  to  get  over  to  London,  and  write  a  Political 

'%Pr})grefs  of  America,  foretelling  the  diffolution  of 

the  Union  ;  would  he  not  deferve  a  horfe-whip  in 

V  place  of  encouragement  ?   When  the  militia  was 


1, . 


<.  ),.. 


r 


1 


I  ■  / 


4f 


It  ■^■-::r     (    '58    )    .    ,  :       ... 

called  out,  and  cannon  were  planted  oppofite  the 
State  Houl'e,  laft  May,  to  keep  oft*  a  gang  of  in- 
folent  Sailors,  were  we  apprehenfive  of  a  Revo-* 
lution  ?  No  ;  but  if  our  Democrats  were  to^ 
hear  of  fuch  an  event  taking  place  in  the  neigh- 
bourhood of  the  Britifh  Parliament,  I  queftion 
but  it  might  produce  a  Civic-Feafl.    ^  ^- 

Even  fuppofe,  that  that  accurfed  thing,  call- 
ed a  Revolution,  were  to  take  place  among  the 
Britifli ;  what  good  would  it  do  us  ?  Would  it 
weaken  their  power  ?  that  cannot  be,  becaufe 
we  fay,  it  has  rendered  the  French  ftronger 
than  ever.  Would  it  deftroy  their  credit,  and 
flarve  them  ?  No,  for  our  gazettes  all  aflure  us 
upon  their  words  and  honours,  that  the  French 
treafury  is  running  over,  and  that  the  people's 
bellies  are  ready  to  burft.  Would  it  make  them 
turn  atheids  and  cannibals  ?  Yes,  but  then, 
it  is  a  good  thing  to  cafl  off  fuperftition  and  pu- 
niih  Ariftocrats.  In  fhort,  which  ever  way  I 
turn  the  matter,  we  are,  according  to  my  fim- 
ple.  judgment,  upon  a  wrong  fcent.  We  are 
wifhing  for  a  Revolution  in  England  !  and  for 
what,  I  would  be  glad  to  know  ?  to  give  the 
Englilh  a  (liare  of  all  the  goody  goodies,  eh  ?  No, 
no  *,  they  are  the  exclufive  property  of  our  dear 
allies,  and,  in  the  name  of  God,  let  them  keep 
them  all  to  themfelves.  To  be  fure  they  have 
juft  given  us  a  tafte,  but  then,  I  hope  we  (hall 
have  too  much  fcnfe  to  run  about  crying  roail 
meat.  , -.  - 

Let  us  open  our  eyes  ;  it  is  pretty  near  time, 
if  we  do  not  wifh  to  be  led  blindfolded  to  the 

end  of  the  farce,  and  even  after  it  is  over. 

How  can  it  be  our  intereft  to  give  way  to  this 
moody  temper  towards  a  nation,  with  which, 
after  all,  cur  connexions  are  nearly  as  clofe  as 


(     159     ) 


thofe  of  Man  and  Wife  I    (T  avoid  the  compari-  ^ 
fon    of  Mother  and  Child,  for  fear  of  afFe^ling  >, 
the  nerves  of  fome  delicate  conftitutions.)     Be-    - 
caufe  a  war  once  exifled  between  f^e  two  coun- 
tries, is  that  a  reafon  that  they  fhould  now  hate 
one  another  ?    They  had   their  battle  out ;    let    ' 
them  follow    the  good    old  cuftom,    drink  and 
Ikake  hands,   and  not  fufFer  themfelves  to  be  fet 
together  by  the  ears  by  a  parcel  of  out-landifh 
butchers.     If  the   animofity   were  on  the  fide  of 
the  Britifli,    they  would  have  fome  excufe  ;  it  is 
almoft  impoflible  for  the  vanquiflied  party  not  to 
retain  fome   tincture  of  revenge  ;    but   for  him  ' 
who  boafls   of  his  viftory  to  brood    over  his  ill-"^ 
nature^  is,  to  fay  the  bed  of  it,   very  unamiable. 
That   maxim  in  war  ;    "  a  foe  vanquifhed  is  a 
•'  foe  no  more,"  ought  ever  to  operate  with  him 
who  calls  himfelf  the  vanquifher,  and,  I  believe, 
we  fhould  be  very  loath  to  furrender  that  title. 
The  depredation    on   the  commerce    is  now 
pleaded  as  the  caufe  of  all  this  ill-blood  ;  but  eve- 
ry man  of  candour  will  acknowledge  thai  this  is 
not  the  caufe.      The  Newfpapers   teemed   with ' 
abufe,  the  mod  unprovoked,  unheard  of,    infa- 
mous abufe  againfl  Great  Britain,  before  a  fingle 
American  veflel  had  been  (topped  by  the  Britiih.  . 
Do  we  find  any  thing  of  this  kind  in  the  Englifli 
papers  ?     Do  the    Englifh  publifh  to  the  world 
that  they  wifh  to  fee  our  conftitution  fubverted  ? 
Have  they  a  Marat  to  mark  out  our  beloved  Pre- 
fident  and  his  Lady  for  the  Guillotine  ?*  Do  their 
Governors,  Magiftrates,    Military  Officers,  &c. 


*  For  you  muft  know,  reader,  Marat  publiflied  what 
DoBor  Moore  calls  **  the  bloody  journal."  The  Editor  of 
the  Philadelphia  Gazette  will  certainly  think  himfelf  honour- 
ed by  being  compared  tea  perfon    whom    he  has  compared 

o  Jefui  Chriji,  \ 


I 

r 


I 


!.|'C, 


■•^■: 


(,  160  ) 

aflemble  with  cannon  firing,  drums  beating,  and 
bells  ringing  to  celebrate  every  little  advantage 
gained  over  our  troops  by  the  Indians  ?  Do  they 
hoift  the  colxvt:»s  of  our  enemy,  and  trample  our 
own  under  their  feet,  and  even  burn  them,  •; 

But,  fay  we,  have  we  not  aright  to  do  as  we  \ 
pleafe  ?  Have  we  not  a    right   to   hate    them  ?  ,'/ 
Yes  ;  but  do  we  exped  them  to  love  us  for  this  ? 
Do   we   imagine  that  revenge  can  fmd  a  place  no 
where  but  in  the  breafls  of  Americans  ?  Do  we, 
becaufe  a  fet  of  fawning  foreigners  tell  us  we  arc 
the  only  virtuous  people  upon   the  face   of  the 
earth,  pofTefs  the    exclufive  privilege   of    being  ^ 
fyftematically  vindidtive  ?  Forgivenefs  of  injuries  .'. 
is  what  we  have  a  right  to  expert  at  the  hands  of 
all  men  ;    but  love  in  return  for  hatred  is  what 
no  mortal  ought  to  expect  from  another  ;     it  is  ; 
an  effort  beyond  the  power  of  human  nature.    '-  ; 

The  publication  of  fentiments  like  thefe,  un- 
doubtedly require  an  apology  on  the  part  of  the 
Publiflier  ;  but  I  think,  it  is  eafily  found.  Many  ,v 
devout  and  fandified  chridian  Bookfellers,  in- 
deed all  of  the  trade  in  the  United  States,  have 
aflifted  in  diftributing  the  Age  of  Reason  ;  and 
not  one  of  them  has  yet  expreffed  the  leafl:  re- 
morfe  of  confcience  for  fo  doing.  Now,  though 
it  may  be,  and  certainly  is,  a  terrible  thing  to 
publiih  the  name  of  Britain  unconnected  with 
execration,  yet  it  is  not  much  worfe,  at  moft, 
than  publifliing  a  libel  againft  God. 

As  for  myfelf,  reader,  I  molt  humbly  befeech 
you  to  have  the  Goodnefs  to  think  of  me — 
Just  what  you  please. 


. 


L' 


FINIS. 


COPY    RIGHT    SECURED    ACCORDING    TO     LAW. 


*'  ;.s/ 


ries 
of      - 
hat      ^ 
t  is 


.'I 


